She's Dangerous
by Ezeiel
Summary: SEQUEL TO "She's All That." Not much is known about Sarah's past before she joined the Bureau, apart from a little info on Tate and Craig... but now someone from her past has returned to haunt her once more. With him he brings the nightmare she wished to forget, the one thing she was running from... her past. I DO NOT OWN CRIMINAL MINDS, IT BELONGS TO CBS AND ABC STUDIOS.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So, this installment might get a little insane at some points- this is just a warning for you. There will not be many cases in the chapters probably four at most?**

**This is because of a serial killer, who refers to himself as CULTURAL NEST and he has a past with our Sarah Ward, which later unleashes mayhem after mayhem... please enjoy!**

* * *

_PREVIOUSLY, __IN THE SARAH JESSICA WARD SERIES..._

_"Jeez, I hope you're training for something or do you just do sprints for fun," Hotch turned, seeing a woman. Brunette, mid-30's, who he was currently profiling. _

_Hotch shook his head, "No, uh I'm trying to do this Triathlon in February," _

_"Oh yeah, the FBI one, you're an Agent," she told him, as he frowned. _

_"Yeah, it is the FBI one," _

_"Oh wait, I'm not supposed to ask if you're an Agent," she fretted. _

_Hotch smiled slightly, "I work for the Justice department," he stated. _

_"Oh, I've see you doing laps at the Y, too." _

_Hotch looked down at her, "And, you're training for surveillance?" _

_"I am doing an MS Triathlon, it's in January but I'm not in an as bigger rush as you," _

_"Well I have about 45 minutes per day, and between work and home. It's hard," Hotch told her, shrugging. _

_"How's your biking going?" she asked suddenly, tilting her head._

_"My tyres are inflated... I think," Hotch admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. _

_"Well you know, I'm not the best cyclist, and I was thinking of riding this weekend and I could use some tips, if you're not busy." _

_Hotch was stuck, "I-just don't know my schedule." he spoke._

_"Yeah. Or we could just see each other out here or at the pool sometime." she shook him off._

_Hotch sighed, "But I should find out in the next couple of days and I could call you." _

_"That'd be great. Um I-I have a card somewhere." she found one and gave it to Hotch quickly._

_"Here. Um, yeah. If something changes. It could be fun. Or at the least, an adventure." she smiled, as he chuckled, _

_"So, uh, what made you think I was an agent?" he asked, wondering. _

_"I saw the suit. What else could you be?"_

_... Beth._

* * *

_Sarah smiled as she saw Morgan walking toward her, "So, was I right or was I right?" she asked, teasing him._

_"Yeah, you were right but just this once." he said, as they slowly walked together. "Just another week then you're back and thank God." he sighed._

_"Oh, I so told you!" she did a fist pump by herself into the air, "A woman's intuition. Always trust it."_

_"Oh, but we did find out something else out." he added._

_"What?" she frowned, "What's up?" she quizzed._

_"Nothing, c'mon let's go see this movie." he led her along, as she caught up but wouldn't let it go._

_"No, you have to tell me."_

_Morgan laughed, noting how impatient and persistent she was- he'd never noticed it before... only when they were by themselves. It was amusing nonetheless. "It doesn't matter."_

_Sarah narrowed her eyes at him, "Well obviously it does, because you brought it which meant you wanted me to question you about it." she stated, using her profiling skills._

_"You'll never believe it if I told you- none of us did when Rossi told us all." Morgan smiled, as they entered the movie theatre._

_Sarah pouted, "Derek, please just tell me." she pleaded._

_Morgan laughed and grabbed the popcorn quickly, "You really wanna know so bad, huh?" he asked her._

_"Well, obviously." she rolled her eyes at him._

_Morgan nodded, "It's Hotch." he spoke._

_"What about him?" she questioned, feeling slightly worried._

_"Apparently, he's got himself a chick." he shrugged, opening the door for her to walk through._

_"What?" she asked, not fully understanding._

_Morgan chuckled, "And I thought you were supposed to be the smart one." he stated, leading her to their seats, "He met a chick while training for his triathlon the other day. According to him, she's cute."_

_"Oh..." Sarah trailed off, feeling funny inside, "Well, good for him for getting back out there. Haley would want him to move on." she agreed, hiding how she really felt, sitting down next to Morgan._

_"I agree, Sweetness."_

* * *

_"So are your tires pumped?" Beth pressed, smirking at Hotch. _

_He laughed, "I hope so."_

_Hotch looked up at her, "So you haven't done a lot of biking?" he questioned. _

_"No, not a ton." she admitted._

_"But you're gonna do a triathlon?" he stated, as she didn't reply and gathered her thoughts. _

_"Go big or go home. __That's what my dad always says." she added, as Hotch nodded._

_"Your dad sounds smart." Hotch commented._

_Beth smiled sadly, "He was. __He passed away a few months ago." she explained._

_"I'm sorry... __Is your mom still alive?"_

_Beth nodded, smiling at him. "Yeah. __She's doing a lot better."_

_"That's good." he agreed, "__How are you doing?" he asked, personally. _

_"I'm hanging in there." she answered. "__So where are we going?" _

_Hotch sighed, "Uh, I usually go up Connecticut and through Rock Creek Park and then back down 16th, but we don't have to do all that if you don't want to." he said, realizing it might be too much._

_Beth shook her head, "No, let's do this." she stopped him, "__If we lose each other, we will meet back at Dupont Circle for coffee." she stated._

_Hotch frowned, "Lose each other? I thought we were gonna do this together." he watched as she mounted her bike._

_"The chase is part of it." and then Beth rode off._

* * *

_Hotch sighed as he trudged toward Sarah's front door. Ever since he'd met the runner this morning, he'd been having second thoughts on their secret relationship with each other. It wasn't practical, not at all._

_When he met Beth, he imagined having a nice, stable relationship. She seemed like a good place for him, she was safe. Hotch liked safe, and that's what Beth was._

_He knocked against her door, and it was soon pulled open. His breathed became caught in the back of his throat, even in jeans and a shirt she still looked so beautiful, that was undeniable. "We have to talk." he said, stepping inside, as she allowed him in._

_Sarah sighed, "Just say it, and then you can leave, Aaron." she said, not bothering to close the door._

_Hotch frowned, but then realized that she must've saw this coming at some point. "You already know?" he questioned, needing to know._

_She nodded, "Yeah, I heard Dave mention something about a Beth, so I just put two and two together." she explained, shrugging._

_Hotch's face fell, "Sarah... " he let out, reaching forward._

_Taking a step back, Sarah sighed, "Aaron." she stopped him._

_He glanced up, seeing no emotion in her eyes. She was harder than him, he knew Sarah was made from Iron and Titanium, she had to be. He could never rack his mind around her being able to shut off her emotions._

_"I'm used to it." she paused, "And it's fine, absolutely fine."_

_Hotch stared at the woman in front of him. She'd just admitted she was always shoved aside when it came to love, and he was shoving her aside now, right now. He didn't want to, but he could see a practical relationship evolving out their fling with one another. Hotch shook his head, "No, don't agree with me." he argued._

_"What else do you want me to say? You want me to fight for you?" she suggested, as he didn't answer, "This was only meant to be a Vegas thing, that's what I signed up for when you kissed me. It was you who wanted to continue our fling." she explained, harshly._

_"Sarah, please-" Hotch pleaded._

_"Aaron, just try to have a better relationship with this Beth, I'm sure she's very nice and brings you happiness." Sarah let out, closing her mind off slowly, watching the man in front of her._

_Hotch stared in solidity. She wasn't even trying to stop him... maybe she didn't love him like he thought she did. "Let me at least-"_

_"Aaron!" she shouted, stopping him abruptly. "What happened between us, it meant nothing. Okay? You were lonely and I- I felt sorry for you." she lied to him, seeing hurt lace his face, his eyes. "Go home and see Jack, I'll see you tomorrow at work." she said, showing him the door._

_Hotch soundlessly stepped outside, and started toward his SUV, not looking back._

_Once the door was closed, Sarah turned on her heel, feeling all the emotions flood to her all at once; affection, fondness, passion, amorousness infatuation but most of all... fervour._

_And then the burning sensation came, along with twinges of discomfort. She was tedious and becoming distressed quickly. It hurt so much, watching him walking away from her door. She felt vexatious. She was ludicrous and unpleasant, senseless, insensitive. And especially naive._

_You futile, shortsighted, dumb bitch._

_She moved to the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of wine, in which was the perfect choice for her to drown her sorrows, "Why did I just let him go?" she questioned herself, allowing tears to cascade down her olive skinned face._

_Then her knees gave way, and she consequently sunk to the tilted floor, collapsing ugly._

_Sarah couldn't deny it any longer, no matter how hard she tried too._

_No matter how much she tried to contradict herself, it wouldn't work... her chest was heaving and her tears were now streaming from her eyes. The area below her eyes slowly puffed out, becoming swollen from the flood of emotions she wasn't used to._

_In all reality, her mind was reeling with the one true realization that was... she couldn't even begin to comprehend how it had happened. She didn't even know when she had indeed done the one thing she vowed she wouldn't do._

_But she had._

_She'd broken her one true vow. But what was it?_

_The vow, was to not fall in love with the Unit Chief, and she had failed._

_Hard._

_Because she had fallen for the mysterious Unit Chief, his solidity and normality had ruined her life, drowning her mind and her heart._

_It was inevitable... this strong, passionate feeling flowing through her body, messing with her mind, driving her insane._

_It was love._

_Love... she was in love with Aaron Hotchner._

_But then came the undying truth... Aaron Hotchner wasn't in love with her._


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: First actual chapter in... and Sarah's already in trouble.**

**Oh dear...**

* * *

A man quickly moved the sharpened saw along, as it slit the limbs carelessly, colliding with the pale skin and cutting easily.

The skin tore away, as the body parts were placed into plastic bin liners and tied up tightly.

Blood splattered everywhere, covering the room and turning it to crimson.

He smirked once he was done, and pulled the bags into his arms, thinking off a creative way to dispose of them.

And he did.

He soon stopped as he noticed something flashes across his television screen, "So, you're doing a tour in 2013 to 2014?" an interviewer asked.

She nodded, "Yeah, one more time- we've got some knew material as well, which will be cool." she spoke.

"But right now, you're about to head home right?" the interviewer pressed.

"It would seem that way, yeah." she told him, walking off. "Bye, bye."

The man smiled at the screen, "Oh, how I've missed you, Sarah."

_New Orleans..._

In the center of the town, a scarecrow was placed with a body attached to it.

Blood cascaded down the wood, and dropped to the floor.

A couple had frozen, as they spotted the body hanging there in the road.

A human Scarecrow.

_A few blocks away..._

Sarah passed her mother, Jessica, a glass of wine and smiled softly, "Happy belated birthday." she toasted her mother. "Here." Sarah handed her a gold envelope.

Jessica eyed her daughter, before slowly opening it. "Oh, my god." Jessica let out, smiling.

Two tickets for _'Chicago'_ on Broadway, sat in her hand. "I know how much you like it, so I figured you and a friend could go and see it again." Sarah told her Mother.

Jessica rose to her feet and pulled her daughter into a tight hug, "Thank you." she pressed a kiss to her daughter's cheek.

The door suddenly knocked, as the two women turned, both looking confused.

"Were you expecting anyone else?" she asked Jessica.

"No, only you."

Sarah frowned and walked toward her mother's front door and swiftly pulled it open.

There stood Detective Sergeant Joseph Payne, from the local P.D. a couple of blocks away. "Sarah." he greeted.

Sarah started at him, "What's up, Payne?" were her words, as she watched the man in front of her, eyeing the officers stood behind him.

"Are you armed tonight?" Payne quizzed, clasping his hands together.

Jessica walked toward Sarah's side, "Joseph, what's this about?" she called out, worried.

"Turn around." Payne let out, pulling out a pair of cuffs on the young woman who stood opposite him.

"What?"

"Turn around, don't make this any harder than it has to be." he warned, watching her slowly turned. Payne moved forward, and locked the cuffs around her wrists.

_Meanwhile in Virginia..._

Hotch's office door was forced open, as Morgan charged in, a panic stricken look on his face, "Morgan? What's wrong?" Hotch stood up, and walked around his desk.

"New Orleans Local PD's taken Sweet Pea into custody on suspicion of a double homicide there." he explained quickly, as Hotch grabbed his go bag, which was already packed. "And I'm going down there." he stated.

Hotch rushed past him, "No, the whole teams coming," he ordered, walking off.

"What's going on?" came Garcia's worried voice, as she rushed around the corner.

The whole team had turned their attention toward their Unit Chief, who was currently charging toward the glass doors, his go bag in hand.

Dave lowered his mug, a deep frown on his face, "What the hell is happening, Aaron?!" he called over to his friend.

"Hotch?" several members asked in confusion.

"We're going to New Orleans! I'll explain on the way, wheels up in thirty."

_Around an hour and a half later..._

Hotch forced his way through the station, arguing reaching his ears, as he charged along.

"C'mon, just go, Ward." a raised voice said.

"What has she done?" a woman called, worried.

The lead Detective turned, "She's being arrested on suspicion of a double homicide." he told the woman.

"Mom, just go." Sarah told the woman, "It'll be fine, I'll be fine... Oh, for Gods sake!" Sarah shouted, as the officer's pushed her along, Joseph Payne following behind them.

Dave spotted Jessica and called out to her, "Jess!"

Jessica turned and saw Dave. "Dave, what you doing here?" she questioned, her face panic-ridden.

"What's going on with Sarah?" he countered, raising an eyebrow.

"I don't know." Jessica shrugged, worried. "Joseph turned up at my place and arrested her. She only got here three days ago."

Hotch sighed, having enough. "Detective, is this really necessary?" he asked.

Sarah turned seeing the whole team, "Oh, my god! They called you all? Seriously." she moaned, walking off.

Jessica sobbed quietly, "Dave, please sort this out." she pleaded with the family friend.

* * *

Sarah stared at the mirror in the interrogation room, sighing. "I can wait as long as you can!" she called, tapping on the table, annoyed.

The door was pushed open, as Payne walked in. "Do you know why you're here?" he asked, sitting opposite her.

"Well... " she trailed off, "... Apparently, I've committed a double homicide." Sarah explained.

"Two bodies were found over your visit here. As soon as you come back to town, there's always trouble but this time, two people died." Payne glared. "This morning, we found another body."

"Doesn't mean I did it." she argued.

"Lewis Evans and Tom Wright." he showed her their pictures, and their dead bodies.

Sarah eyed him, "And?"

"Well... they're dead." Payne told her. "They both went to school with you." he spoke.

Sarah nodded, "But I didn't do it."

Payne sighed, "Every time you come to town, why'd you go to the cemetery? Huh?" he pressed.

Sarah shook her head, not believing how insensitive he was, "Uh, I don't know? Maybe, because there's a headstone with my son's name on it?!" she demanded, as he fell silent. "Oh, but how would you know?! You wouldn't Payne, because you're such an insensitive son of a bitch to even notice anything anymore, you just have your mind set on taking down good people!" Sarah shouted at him, fuming.

"You call yourself good?"

The door was pushed open, as Hotch walked in, "Detective, I would like to speak with my agent." he requested, standing there.

"No." Sarah called out.

"You heard her." Payne said.

"Detective, I'm ordering you." Hotch raised his voice, staring at Sarah.

Payne rolled his eyes, and walked out.

Hotch moved and sat in his seat, "How're you holding up?" he asked, knowing that wasn't the best question to ask her at the moment.

"Fine."

Hotch didn't look at all convinced by her answer, "Double homicide?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.

Sarah watched him, "Which I didn't commit." she added, looking down.

"We don't know that." he couldn't stop his words from escaping his mouth. He regretted it as soon as he said it.

Sarah's face changed, and it became hard- like steel, all the emotions disappearing quickly, upon hearing his reply, "You don't believe me."

Hotch sighed, "I never said that." he said, reaching her hand in a vast attempt to regain any possible trust he could gain from the woman, but it looked hopeless right now.

"You didn't need too," Sarah crossed her arms over her chest, watching him.

Hotch stared at her, about to say something else, when the door opened again and Payne walked back in, "Agent Hotchner, outside." he said, his eyes trained on Sarah.

Hotch rose to his feet knowing something was wrong. "Why?" Hotch eyed him, frowning.

"Agent Ward, why did you attempt to hide the fact that you have a criminal record with an expunged file in it." Payne questioned, ignoring Hotch completely.

"What?"

Payne looked at the man next to him, "Agent Hotchner, please leave." he ordered. "Now."

Hotch gave her one last glance, before walking out of the room to stand with the rest of the team, outside.

Payne was sat opposite Sarah, as she stared at him.

"In this file, it says you beat your Chemistry teacher to a pulp, why'd you do that?" he asked.

Sarah looked at him, "It's all there, see for yourself." she replied.

Payne sighed, looking at the file and reading it. "You claimed that he... that he... "

"Just spit it out, or shall I read it for you." she rushed him along, tapping her foot as she paced quickly.

"That he touched you." he said.

Sarah rolled her eyes, "That's not what it says." she sighed, "I should know, I wrote it."

Payne frowned, "You claimed that his molested you." he finally said it.

"There we go, now was is that hard to say, Detective?" she asked, "And that man definitely did it."

"Well, how come you're the only person to come forward?" Payne countered, raising an eyebrow, folding his arms over his chest.

Sarah looked at him, "My father had it expunge, in 1993." she spoke, "I don't know how many kids at the school it happened to, I was just his favoured target." she let out, frowning at the memories.

"Who else knows?"

"Only myself, Oliver, the judge and Archer, but now my team knows." she swallowed, "Just don't you dare let my Mom find out, it will break her heart."

"Archer's on his way here." Payne explained.

"Then, you keep him away from me."

* * *

**A/N: What did you think of the first chapter then?**


	3. Chapter 3

The team watched as their conversation continued.

Hotch's face was stricken as pain crossed it, why she kept that to herself was unknown to him, he just couldn't believe it.

Dave felt sicken to his core, looking at the once child, whom used to be as happy as could be, who was now full of hurt.

Morgan sighed, he knew what she was going through, and he knew how hard it was to even put into words.

Reid, couldn't process the fact that she kept it to herself for twenty years and never said anything.

Emily and JJ on the other hand, were filled with shock and astonishment, unable to even think about what had just happened. Their friend had just told them as well as Payne that she was molested as a child.

The group was grateful, that Garcia was a witness to the conversation; she would break into two, upon hearing their words.

None of them had even known anything about Sarah's past, especially Dave considering how long he'd known her and he had no clue about what had happened for her to get thrown out of her High School when she did.

* * *

"Did you ever feel safe in school, Detective?" Payne nodded. "… I didn't. School is where you're supposed to feel safe, that apart from your home." Payne was pacing now.

Payne looked at her, "So, you beat him with your bare hands?" he asked, as she stood up and swapping positions with him, so that he was sitting now.

"He deserved it, it was coming to him and he knew it. He knew he couldn't keep it up, not without someone coming down on him like a ton of bricks, I guess I got there first. As you say, first come, first served."

"You were angry, that's clear with the injuries he came away with." Payne sighed, running a hand along the back of his neck.

She shrugged, "The bastard deserved it."

"But all that anger for four years, being built up and up." Payne taunted.

"A person can only take so much." she admitted, staring down at the floor. "Before they break."

"And you lost it?" he asked.

Sarah nodded, "Obviously."

Payne stood, "I want Archer in here now, and you're gonna talk. Whether you like it or not." Payne stared, knowing something was gonna happen if he did start mentioning Dennis Archer.

"This is about a double homicide! Not him!" she argued, rising to his feet, glaring.

"We need to get down to the bottom of this first."

* * *

The door opened, as Archer walked in, smiling. "... Well I'll let you two to catch up." Payne got up, and walked out, leaving them in there.

"I never knew you were coming back to town, as soon as I found out, I had to come straight down here to say hello." he smiled.

"Good for you, now go away and leave me alone." Sarah let out, glaring at the floor.

"You're not happy to see me?" he taunted her.

"Who would ever be happy to see you?" she looked at him for a while, before turning her back on him.

"We had fun didn't we?"

That made Sarah stop. "We had fun? Are you kidding me? Do you think I had fun?" she demanded. "Did it ever look like I had fun?!"

"I don't know, did you?"

She stopped herself, and sat back down. Her fists were clenched tightly, as she breathed in and out, deeply.

"You were the only one who rebelled." he stated.

She nodded, "I was the only who had nothing to lose, that's why I got excluded from that high school, that's why I never saw you again. That's why all that was expunged, all because of that one particular day, all in twenty five minutes, you got your ass kicked, and I got excluded. Best thing I ever did." she admitted.

"Oh, here comes the emotion. C'mon throw it all at me."

She smiled to herself. "Don't think I won't do it again." she added.

"You won't, because Detective Payne will be there to stop you." Archer stated, smiling wickedly.

Sarah rolled her eyes, "No one's coming in Dennis, they've used you as bait to get to me. They want me to kick your head in, lose control." Sarah told him, as he stood properly now.

"What happened to you after?" Archer asked her.

"I was taught how to control my anger, bury it, forget the people who caused it. Forget it was there." she answered. "Which I did."

"And they were?"

Sarah eyed him, "You know who they were."

Archer smirked, "Tell me."

"I don't need to you, you already know." Sarah closed her eyes, "... You don't have to stay, you can leave, there's no need for you to be here now." she said, as he slowly walked toward the door.

"You were the one who got away," Archer sung, as she crossed her arms, closing her eyes again. "... Whore."

Sarah sighed, "You just don't know when to keep your mouth shut, old man." she turned and faced him.

* * *

"What're you going to do, Ward?" Archer taunted, as she rolled her eyes.

"Nothing." he chuckled, taking off his coat.

He placed a CD down on the table. "I brought this with me, figured you'd sign it for me." he slid it over to her, as Sarah looked at the glass mirror, and slid it back.

"You do you realize, that you won't leave the station, now that you're here." she spoke, as Archer laughed at her.

"I'm a very respected member of this community, Ward. I'm Principal of the High School around the block from here."

She shook her head, "Well, have you ever wondered, let alone considered that maybe the parents of the students that go to your school, might be outside, demanding your arrest, for what you did to all those children?" she countered, as his face dropped.

Archer scoffed, "You're bluffing."

"Am I?" she taunted him, "Detective Payne doesn't care about you or your career; I bet they're searching through your home right as we speak. Scared much?" Sarah asked, grabbing the chair.

"Why don't you sit down, you're going to be here a while," he eyed her.

"Do you have a marker?" she asked, grabbing the CD from his grasp, as he pulled one out.

"Dennis, you'll be arrested for molestation, rape, grooming hundreds of kids. I highly doubt you'll ever get out, but I'm gonna be at your hearing. Visit you ever year, just to make your life living hell. And then, you may live with all that regret and guilt for the rest of your pathetic life." she signed it, placing it in front of him, as she bent beside his ear.

"Oh, one last thing... " she looked at the glass, where the team were all standing behind. "Did you have fun?"

Dennis Archer got up from his seat, and ran out of the door to be met by two officers, who restrained him, as he looked at her. "Tell them, I didn't do anything! Ward!" He protested, as she rolled her eyes.

And then she shut the door in his face.

* * *

**A/N: So... what do you think of the first two chapters then?**

**No more updating until tomorrow probably, The Desolation of Smaug is calling me and I need to watch it again EVEN if it for the fifth time in the past two days.**

**R&R!**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Since watching Sherlock, I've decided to make Sarah little more clever than she may first appear. I get a lot of my ideas from TV shows...**

**My friend has a Memory Palace, and he kinda divulged it to me, and I thought it seemed really interesting and just different(it's just like in Sherlock!). ****Also, I'm gonna include some Math problems that I was set along time ago at school once... I found them really easy, but that's because I'm quite good at maths.**

**And there's also a chat with Rossi too!**

**I haven't decided if I yet like this chapter though, if you don't please tell me and I will have rid of it as soon as!**

* * *

Payne eyed the woman in front of him, and pushed the glass of mango juice she'd asked for in front of her.

"I'm the smartest person in this station." Sarah told him. "Despite my education, I was taught what I needed to know in London and I got the education from those willing to give it to me."

Payne scoffed, "I believe that the smartest person is your friend, Doctor Reid." he said.

Sarah nodded, "Spencer, has an eidetic memory and an IQ of 187, whereas I have something much more advanced." she explained. "Which was put into place due to my lifestyle and job."

Payne sighed, "Really?" he raised any eyebrow, "What's that, kid?"

"A Memory Palace."

"Okay, answer this... " he paused, "One day, a person went to horse racing area, Instead of counting the number of human and horses, he instead counted 74 heads and 196 legs. Yet he knew the number of humans and horses there. How did he do it, and how many humans and horses are there?" he slid over a piece of paper, and she began writing.

**HM = Human**

**HR = Horse**

**HM + HR = 74**

**2HM + 4HR = 196**

**(2HM + 4HR) - (2 HM + 2HR) = 196 - 148 **

**2HR = 48 **

**HR = 24 **

**HM + (24) = 74 **

**HM = 74 - 24 **

**HM = 50**

**24 horses and 50 humans.**

She slid it back over to him moments later, and he soon smiled, "Impressive." he commented, nodding.

Outside, Hotch turned to Reid to see him just finishing.

She was smarter than the kid, and they all knew it, but how had she made it seem that she wasn't?

She'd deceived them all, to keep secrets. She's lied to them, deceived them...

It was strange considering how close they all were. Everyone knew each other's business which made it really hard to keep anything private in their lives.

Even Hotch struggled with it.

But Sarah seemed so open all the time, and she had a more developed mind that the smartest person on the team? It just didn't make any sense for her to keep everything quiet that had happened in the past.

Morgan and Dave shared a look of confusion, "You know any of this, Rossi?" Morgan quizzed, raising an eyebrow.

Dave shrugged, "I don't know everything you think I know." he let out.

Emily scoffed, "Really? You're like her second father, she tells you anything." she stated, narrowing her eyes at him. "You sure you didn't know anything about any of this crap, Rossi?"

"No." he shook his head, abruptly. "I've known the family for a long time- twenty five years? I don't know everything that goes on behind closed doors, Jesus." he grumbled, rolling his eyes.

"Reid," Morgan turned his friend, "What's a memory palace?"

Reid's face was shocked, "Her mind must be super awesome." he said in awe. "Anyway, a memory palace or the Method of Ioci, is it a method of memory enhancement which uses visualization to organize and recall information. She most likely developed it when she joined the CIA." he shrugged, "But in fact, she's correct. Sarah is the smartest person in this station... probably in New Orleans."

"Is it possible that Clyde taught her?" Emily frowned.

Spencer shrugged, "Possibly." he answered, "It would make sense if he did, considering what her job was back then."

Hotch sighed, "We need to send someone in there."

"You." JJ said.

Hotch shook his head, "No, not me." Hotch looked around his team members, "Dave?"

"Why?"

Hotch looked at him, "Because she trusts you."

"Hotch ... " Dave closed his eyes, "I know things, you don't."

"Just try, Dave."

* * *

Dave walked in. "So… " he closed the door, moving toward a seat. "I was sent in here to get information out of you, kid."

"I bet you feel special, Dave." Sarah stared ahead.

Dave chuckled, "Alright." He raised his hands.

Sarah sighed, "What would you like to know?" she asked.

"Your Memory Palace would be a great place to start, don't you?" Dave lent forward in his chair.

She smiled, "I developed it when I was in the SIS, for personal reasons, but it became vital in the CIA." she paused, "I can remember most things Dave, if not all. That's all it is, but I think what you really want to know, as well as the rest of the team why I kept Archer to myself for all those years."

Dave nodded, "Yeah, kid... something like that." he said, crossing his arms.

"Because it was my burden to carry, no one elses." she said, "It happened to me, and therefore I thought it should stay secret until the time was right for it be brought up when it needed to be." she explained, walking around the room.

"You could've told me." Dave stated, sighing.

"And risk all your questions?" she pressed, raising an eyebrow, "No, that makes no sense for me to even attempt to consider that... it's personal Dave."

Dave tensed his jaw, "Kid, we're your family." he told her what he thought she wanted to hear.

"No, Dave. You and those people outside are whom I work with. We know each other's business and I don't like that... not at all. I like to keep things to myself sometime's because I like to keep all my burdens and embarrassments locked up and away from other's. In no way are we related, not by blood or distant relatives... we only call ourselves a family because we spend some much time together."

Dave had fallen silent by now, and just stared at her.

"My family left me, when I was seventeen... Oliver and Jessica had already divorced two years before, so I was stuck in a broken household with a father, who would drink so much of his money down the drain. Chris ran away to Pakistan to be a War Veteran. Jon stayed close, but yet he became distant. Joel and Arlo moved away from it all to go to LA. And me, well I tried to create a fantasy of music and film to disguise the past and in hope, an attempt at normality... which when I think about it- failed."

She paused to see the look on her old friend's face, she sighed. "The problem is, I think too much and then I put myself in a bad mood. I should be grateful for what I've made for myself... a nice and stable lifestyle but that doesn't mean I'm happy. It's a front to keep those from prowling my territory... I don't want them knowing about my past and what I've been through. It's a defense mechanism. It's effective, but when something goes wrong it all comes crashing down around you."

She smiled, as she thought, "One person's craziness, is another person's reality." she spoke, looking at Dave.


	5. Chapter 5

"Joseph! Another bodies turned up down town!" an officer called, as Hotch gave a sigh of relief.

Hotch blocked Payne's way, stopping him. "Detective, you do realize that this is a Triple Homicide- if we can call it that. You know, that we'll have to take this into the Bureau's hands. I want you to release my Agent." he requested, calmly.

"She's still a suspect, Agent Hotchner." he argued, puffing out his chest as he took a step toward the agent.

Hotch shot him a glare, "Agent Ward was away on cases during the two Homicide's, myself and my team can verify that for you." he stated, eyeing the man closely before taking a step back.

Payne watched the taller man, before unlocking the door and looking over at Sarah, "Agent Ward... you can go." he called, feeling strained that she was slipping through his fingers like butter.

* * *

The team watched as Sarah shouted at Joseph Payne. The guy had let Archer be bailed out, "What were you thinking?!" she demanded, getting in his face.

Joe rolled his eyes, "Oh, calm down." he pushed her back, trying to get away from the already raging woman.

"No!" she shook her head, "You let him go." Sarah pointed at him, glaring at the man. "You know what he did all those years ago, and you still let-" she cut herself off, before she said anything else.

Joe didn't reply, and just stared at her.

"Who paid for it?" Sarah questioned, raising an eyebrow. She needed to know... someone had done it.

Joe frowned, "Huh?" he asked.

Morgan sighed and took over, "Who bailed him out?" he rephrased.

"I don't know!" Joe shouted back.

"Fat and dumb." Sarah commented. "You've put on at least two stone. No, I'm being generous. Three." she spoke, glaring. "It's all the Doughnuts... they'll kill ya."

"What'd you call me?!" his face turned beetroot red.

"I called you fa- " she paused, as an Officer walked in.

"Agent Ward, there's a kid outside. He says he has something for you." she walked past the guy, Morgan and Hotch following her out as she stopped at the station entrance.

The kid was a teenager, around 15. He smiled as he saw Sarah coming over to him, "Hey S, this guy gave me this to give to you." he handed her a piece of ragged paper.

Sarah took the paper, eyeing the kid, "Darren?"

He stayed silent, as she unfolded the paper. Her eyes scanned the text, as she tightened her jaw.

**DID YOU HAVE FUN, LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE?**

She glanced down at Darren, panicked, "What way did the guy go?" she pressed.

"That way." he pointed left, as Morgan, Darren and Hotch watched her run off.

Sarah darted down the road, by passing cars as they beeped angrily in her direction. She kept running not even remembering where she was going, but that didn't matter, she knew New Orleans like the back of her hand.

Morgan and Hotch were trying to catch up with her, she'd just ran off, leaving them standing there, "Sweet pea!"

She shot off, knowing where to go. It was the place where she first heard those words, no one knew of it. She rounded a corner, seeing Archer being held by a covered up 6'2 male. "Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." he slit Archer's throat before running off.

"Hey!" Sarah shouted, running after him, "Stop!" she rounded another corner to see the unknown male running toward a parked SUV. She pulled out her firearm and began firing at him, seeing one of her shots nip his leg.

The man turned, and fired back at her quickly, his shots missing her inches. He ripped off his ski mask and flashed her a sharp grin, which she couldn't rid her mind of.

It was already stuck in there.

Sarah froze, knowing who it was and what they were doing there.

_Stuart Cullen._

Her pace slowed and she came to a halt, and stared ahead. "It's time." she murmured under her breath.

The SUV quickly sped off as she turned and began walking back the way she'd come. Sarah rounded an alley, Hotch and Morgan already seeing to a dead Dennis Archer.

She stopped in front of them, "Martin Luther King Jr." she whispered, walking over to the two men crouching over Archer's body.

Hotch narrowed his eyes and looked up at her, "What?" he questioned, slowly rising to his feet.

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere." she quoted, staring into nothing.

Morgan sighed, "He's gone, man. The neck wound's deep... it was quick."

Hotch closed his eyes and took a step back, "And we weren't quick enough." he turned to Sarah, "Did you get a good look at him?"

She shook her head, "No." she lied.

_She knew exactly who that was... how could she not?_


	6. Chapter 6

The team quickly arrived back at Quantico, to see Anderson walking toward them, as they exited the lift. "Agent Ward, there's a call for you on line two." he told Sarah, as the team watched.

She nodded, "Cultural Nest?" she asked, following Anderson into the bullpen.

"Yes..." he nodded, "Whatever that means."

Sarah picked up the phone and put it on speaker, allowing everyone else to hear it, "Hello?"

"That was fun, wasn't it?" the voice chuckled, "You shot me in the leg, it hurts like a bitch."

Sarah frowned, as she listen to his voice, "Sorry about that, but you slit someone's throat." she stated, like it was obvious.

He chuckled, "You're gonna love what I've got planned next, I'll promise you that."

Sarah swallowed hard, not knowing what to expect, it could be anything. "And what is that? What do you have planned?" she asked, looking down.

"I've got two more friends; do you wanna know who they are?" his voice was getting higher and higher.

"Okay, go ahead." Sarah ordered, but soon regretted it.

He cleared his throat, "Well, our first friend, is a close friend of yours a twenty-nine year old from Boston, oh and I believe he was in a band, you know him. Zeke, you remember him?"

Hotch's eyes fell on Sarah, as he watched her face.

It was hard, but composed.

"A-and... the second?" her voice cracked, now knowing that he was capable of anything... anything.

"Our final participant, is very close to you. Thirty one year old from New Orleans, one of your three brothers, but which one? He has a little boy... "

She looked forward, clenching her jaw. "Jon."

A laugh echoed through the room, "You beat me to the punch line, no fair! You're such a bummer!" and then he cut the line.

Sarah rose to her feet, and grabbed another phone, "Yeah... I want a squad car to patrol 89 Renwick Avenue... possible abduction." Sarah paused, as she paced. "There may be a child involved."

Morgan chased after Hotch, as he spotted him walking toward the conference room, "Hotch!" he called.

Hotch turned, hearing his name being called, it was Morgan. "Morgan, what'd you want?" he asked, looking at him as he came to a stop.

"We can't have Sweet Pea working on this case, you know that. Why's she still on it?" he questioned, as Hotch sighed.

"Morgan, I don't want to approach her right now, she's emotional unstable, I could set her off, or any member of the team could." he glanced at his former lover, feeling the ache in his chest return. "We can't let that happen, we need her to have a clear head, so she can help us. She's the only one who knows anything about our victims... and about the guy who's done this."

Morgan rolled his dark eyes, "Hotch, man look at her, she's a mess. Now, he's taken her brother, just look at her, god damn... do something!" he complained.

"Morgan, don't push me." Hotch replied, causing him to stop. "Just... go and try and find some new leads, which can help us in some way."

* * *

Anderson was on the run again, "Agent Ward!" he called out, chasing after her quickly.

She turned, as he caught up with her, "What is it?"

He handed her a report, as she opened it and read it quickly before closing it again.

"Liam Grey was stopped while attempting to cross the border to North Carolina, and then demanded to be brought to you here in Quantico, Virginia." she nodded slowly.

"And where is he now?" Anderson looked past her. "Anderson?" she called, as his eyes drifted back. "Grant?"

"In the interrogation room, waiting for you."

"Tell the team where I am." Sarah spoke, walking off.

It wasn't long before she made it, and Sarah opened the door, "Why were you trying to cross the border to North Carolina?" she sat down.

"He's going to kill me."

She frowned at his reply. "Who?"

Liam eyed her. "You know who... him. _Cultural Nest_."

Sarah sighed deeply, closing her eyes, briefly. "Liam, that is just a name that he desires to present himself with, it doesn't mean anything... not yet anyway." she spoke. "It's probably an anagram..."

Liam then started panicking. "He will kill me! Don't you care about that?!" he stood up, outraged.

"Sit down." Liam slowly sat back down, "Do you know who is doing this?"

"No, why would I?"

Sarah bit the inside of her cheek. "Liam, my patience is running very thin, so you better tell me the truth if you know something that could help both you and I." she ordered, as he hesitated. "Liam."

His hand searched through his pocket, as he fished for something, "He posted this through my door, a few weeks back. It's a list of people, and wait don't tell me... You know them all really well."

She unfolded the piece of paper, seeing all the names written on it. "Liam, you know that three of those people on this list are already dead, and you're next. I can put you into protective custody." Sarah explained. "Because he has order of who he wishes to kill."

"You're arresting me?!"

She rolled her eyes, "No, I'm protecting you, Liam. Yes or no." she stood up.

"Oh... yeah, sure." he nodded, as something popped into her head.

"One last thing. Do you recognize the phrase 'I wish you luck'?" Sarah asked.

Liam shook his head, "No, I don't. Sorry."

"Thank you for your cooperation." she reached for the door handle.

"Thank you, Sarah." she turned back. "Good to see you again." Liam added.

"Likewise." she closed the door, looking at the crumpled paper.

There were over fifteen names on it... her family, everyone on the team...

"Who's on the list?" Emily asked, as Sarah swallowed thickly.

"Too many people."

* * *

The team froze.

They all reached for their weapons, drawing them quickly and aiming them directly at the man, wearing a ski mask, who stood opposite them.

The unknown man had pulled out a Sub-machine gun, and had restrained Grant Anderson from behind, holding it to his head, alerting everyone in the Bullpen immediately.

Sarah was the first on the scene, her eyes trained on _him_ across the room, staring her down. She was soon followed by Morgan and Prentiss. Reid and JJ were hot on their tales, though.

Hotch and Dave were the last to arrive, with a panicked Penelope Garcia stood behind them.

"Hello, Agent Ward." the man called over to Sarah, pulling Anderson closer.

"Sir, let Agent Anderson go." Hotch shouted at him, gritting his teeth.

The dark eyes found his, glaring, "I never asked for your opinion, Agent Hotchner." he spat, and turned back to Sarah. "Give yourself up."

She stared at him, "What do you want?" she asked, frowning.

The man chuckled, "Oh, I thought it was simply quite obvious with my request only a few moments ago." he narrowed his eyes at the woman he desired. "I want you."

Sarah nodded, "Let Agent Anderson go, and we can do that." she told him, lowering her firearm.

"No, no. It doesn't work like that, little girl." he sighed, waving his gun around. "Now... you listen to me or Grant here loses his existence."

"Alright." she placed the gun down, kicked it toward him. "Alright." she repeated, beginning to move toward despite knowing she could be killed in seconds to save a life.

"Sweet Pea." Morgan hissed, shaking his head, glancing at the people around him and seeing them doing nothing.

She looked at him, backing away from the team, moving between the desks, "It's okay." she promised, nodding to him. "It's okay, Derek."

The man grabbed her from behind, and picked up her gun which was laid on the floor, and he aimed both of the firearms at both Anderson and Sarah, smirking. "Right, Grant... please restrain Sarah here, with the cuffs hanging from her belt, please."

Anderson tentatively move forward, taking a hold of the cuffs and slowly locking them around her thin wrists.

The man sighed, and locked the cuffs more tightly than Anderson, causing Sarah to wince sharply. "Right... we'll be going now." he announced.

Emily shook her head, "You move... we shoot." she warned him.

"Oh, Emily Prentiss... you may have inflicted Ian Doyle, but your attraction won't work on me, sorry." he sighed deeply, "And I believe that my Sub-machine gun, will most definitely out do your measly Glock 17." he pulled off his ski mask, smiling widely. "Now, please lower your weapons, if you'd mind. Or let's say, for both Grant and Sarah's sake at least."

And then he made a run for it, "If you try to stop me, I will not be responsible for my actions."

Sarah sighed, as she was pulled back toward the lift, where he quickly pulled both her and Anderson inside.

Once he was out of sight, Morgan quickly made for the stairs along with every member of the team, minus Spencer and Garcia who had frozen, following him as soon as they could; just see if they could do something before it was actually too late.

The five of them managed to make it out of the building, to see Anderson being escorted by Security toward them.

"Where is she, Anderson?!" Morgan demanded.

Anderson gulped, "He took her, she's what he wanted, sir. Not me, I couldn't do anything." he let out, quietly, looking terrible already.

Morgan let out a shaky breath, and kicked the entrance door in frustration.

Sarah was gone.

* * *

**A/N: I'll tell you something... poor Anderson, he's been running around and almost been killed, the poor bloke.**

**I feel quite mean.**

**R&R!**


	7. Chapter 7

Emily Prentiss walked to her desk, as she saw the rest of the team gathered, but froze seeing something on her desk.

A post-it-note.

She carefully, lifted it up and unfolded it and read it. _'Clyde will know what to do, if something goes wrong. Call him.'_

She knew straight away that Sarah had left her the note, knowing that she could get hold of Clyde the quickest.

Emily thumbled through her things, and found her cell, and quickly dialled Clyde's number and waited for him to answer. "Clyde!" she exhaled once he picked up.

"Darling, what's wrong? You sound panicked." the smooth talking voice of Clyde Easter met her ears.

"Clyde, where are you right now?"

She heard him clear his throat, "I never knew you were that keen- but if you must know, I've just landed in New York... why?" he questioned, knowing something was definitely up.

Emily sighed, looking at the team, "You need to come to Quantico. Now." she said.

Clyde laughed, "But darling, that's at least an hour's flight? You're joking me, aren't you?" he paused, "Tell me what's wrong, Emily."

"Sarah's been taken."

"By who?" Clyde demanded, almost immediately.

Emily sighed again, "That's a good question; we don't know."

"Say no more... I'm on my way."

* * *

An hour later, in walked a panicked-stricken Clyde Easter. He stormed into the bureau, a furious look on her face. "What the hell is going on!" he shouted, seeing the team gathered, with Penelope Garcia talking quickly.

"You tell me what the hell happened in the past hour!" he demanded, angrily. "Get up the footage and show me it."

Garcia, flustered, swiveled her laptop around to face him.

Clyde watched the footage, and he face changed when he saw the man reveal his face, he covered his face with his hands.

The team exchanged glances between each other, frowning. "What is it, Clyde?" Emily questioned.

"That man, is someone she put into prison ten years ago. His name is Stuart Cullen." Clyde rose to his feet, sighing. "You need to find her, I can't tell you how long she has, but it won't be long- a week at most. That was his M.O. back in the day." he explained. "Rape, stabbing, torture... and once he was done he would dismember his victims bodies."

Dave stood up, "Whoa… wait a second. The CIA agent Stuart Cullen? The good guy, gone bad guy?" he asked.

Clyde nodded, "Yes, him." he confirmed.

"Are you tellin' us she knew who it was, but didn't even bother to let us now?" Morgan said, confused.

"Cullen... is a bad nut. Bad egg, whatever you want to call him." Garcia stated, pulling up records. "Put into Prison for ten years- he escaped a week ago. He is as bad as it can get... gun possession... murder, rape. Everything." she typed away.

"Right, Penelope... get his photo out everywhere. Do everything you have to, but I would keep an eye on your computers." Clyde advised, disgust filling his voice as he spoke.

JJ frowned at the words, "What does that mean?"

Hotch and Morgan sighed deeply, knowing what he meant straight away.

Clyde turned his back on the group, "He likes an audience."

_"Clyde, we need to discuss something." Sarah said, looking over at her old friend, sighing._

_Clyde nodded but soon frowned, "What is it?" he questioned, a little concerned at her words. He knew something was up straight away._

_"When Stuart Cullen is scheduled to be released, he will come for me... as revenge. And you as well, but I will be his first target. I know he'll probably attempt to kill me and he might do so, but if anything happens to me, and I can't warn the team quick enough... you need to." she explained, looking as terrified as possible._

_Clyde nodded, "I have your back, as you have mine." he told her, still frowning. He then saw Sarah shudder as they discussed the future._

_"He will come for them, and he will not hold back... not any member." she paused, "I need you to promise me, Clyde. Promise me that you'll keep them safe, warn them- do everything you can."_

_"I promise."_

"Agent Hotchner."

Hotch looked up quickly, drawing his attention away from their latest crisis, as he saw Jack being led into the bullpen. His eyes were glued to his son, as he approached the group. "Jack?" he spoke, utterly bewildered.

"Dad!" he ran into his father's welcoming arms, "They let me turn on the siren again!" he Hotch tightly but soon pulled away as his eyes scanned the crowd. Jack saw everyone apart from Sarah, and his face fell, dramatically. "Dad... where's Saz?" he questioned, aloud.

Hotch closed his eyes, and looked back at the rest of the team for help, and JJ did just that. "Hey, Jack... how about you and I go find some soda, huh?" she suggested, rising to her feet.

"Sure!" Jack agreed, following JJ quickly.

Hotch turned back to Gina Sharp, who looked as worried as he did, "What the hell is Jack doing here? He should be at school."

Gina sighed, "A call was sent in an hour ago, the school was told that Jack was to be picked up by an agent from Behavioural Analysis Unit in Quantico, and be brought straight here, to keep him safe. It was sent by Agent Ward, whom we all know is clearly not here, and she also said in her message that there is a letter in her top drawer on the right side of her desk, which is locked in her office." Gina paused, "It's urgent."

The team watched Hotch run to her office, as he yanked the door open, causing it to hit the wall. He ripped open every single drawer and rooted through them, and pulled out and large package which had his name on the front.

He walked back out, pulling the package open. Inside was a letter which he handed straight to Clyde, as he placed multiple pictures of a tattoo sleeve on the table.

"That's her tattoo sleeve; she had it done eight years ago." Clyde said quickly, as his eyes flicked over the writing on the paper he was holding. "This letter is telling us what we need to do. It's a list of instructions." he then read it aloud to the team:

_1. The BAU is the first place Cullen will go, you have to be prepared for that intrusion and immediately contact Clyde Easter, he will know what to do._

_2. His target will be myself, and if he does succeed in taking me then you must not follow him or try to stop him, because then I'm dead._

_3. Get Garcia to find out everything she can on Cullen, even the things that are hidden from the bureau's eyes. _

_4. Looks at his bills and receipts for the past weeks leading up to his plan to walk into the bureau. Keep an eye on them, that could give you an unsuspecting lead you will need._

_5. He will taunt you, personally- this means by calls, text ect. He gets off on the taunts; do not let your guard down at anytime._

_6. You need to connect a property to him- he will not own one, but he will probably be squatting in one in Virginia._

_7. The tattoo sleeve will be a great help- there's another sheet in the package which tells you everything it about it. It will help— that's a promise. There are dates which will come in very useful... I promise._

_8. Everything in his profile will be centered around me or the CIA- call Lance Sucre for help if you need to._

_9. I can stall him for around at least week but after that, to him I will be good as dead. That's your deadline. _

_10. Don't give up, you have all the information I can provide you with in the meantime, other than that you have two people from the SIS and CIA who know what to do. I'm sorry._

The distinctive dates which were marked on her upper arm shone across the sheet, as it glistened in the light.

_2000_

_2002_

_2009_

_2010_

_2012_

Clyde sighed, seeing Garcia almost in tears, but the others were like stone. "Penelope, call Lance Sucre, like she said. We need him, tell him of the situation and force him to drive down to Quantico from Langley." he ordered. "And you lot- Dave and Emily, you need to go to her house, check every room on anything that can help us. Jayje, Morgan you will need to visit ADX Florence, meaning you will need to catch a flight to Colorado. You will need to find out how he escaped ect." he watched them all rush off.

"And Penelope, Reid, you two, me and Agent Hotchner here are going to do the rest." Clyde finished.


	8. Chapter 8

Garcia frowned, "What does she mean about the tattoo sleeve, though?" Garcia quizzed, not understanding what Sarah had meant by it.

"I think what she meant, was everything we needed to know is in the UV tattoo. Are there more photos? UV ones?" Reid pressed, as Hotch passed him the envelope and there was more.

He spread them across the table, so the others could see. "There are dates here, 2000, 2002, 2009, 2010, 2012."

Clyde nodded, "She said she needed to remember the dates, because they were vital. She told me about them. 2002 was when Cullen was incarcerated and sent to ADX Florence, for triple homicide. 2009 and 2010 was George Foyet, you know all about so I don't need to go into detail." Clyde sighed, "Cullen had had contact with him from the outside and told Foyet where to find Sarah, which made him an accessory to murder. And 2012, is the year that he was released— this year, but he escaped two weeks before his release."

"What about 2005?" he questioned Clyde. "2000?"

Clyde frowned, as he tried to think but he could remember what was significant about 2005. "2000... is when her SIS task when completely wrong and she very nearly died in a gunfight." he said, but not telling the team all of it.

That years she was tortured beyond belief.

Hotch frowned, "But from what it's shown on the photos, there's everything. There's names, numbers, dates, addresses... like I said everything." he spoke. "She's got it all linked together..."

Clyde crossed his arms over his chest, "The whole point was that she wanted to be ready for when he came. She became obsessed with the plan... to be ready. And in short, she was. She's told us what to do, and we have to follow it."

Garcia paused, and she looked up from her screen, "So, what's her escape plan?" she questioned, frowning.

Clyde refused to meet any of their eyes, "She doesn't have one." he spoke.

"Why not?" Garcia persisted.

Clyde finally looked up, his eyes on Garcia, "Because she didn't plan to come out alive— she even had a DNR order signed in case her body was found. If she dies, she wants to stay dead."

Garcia sucked in a breath, "But we can help her, we're her family." she whimpered.

Hotch turned to Reid, who was studying the photos, "Reid, what'd you see?" he said; pulling off his suit jacket, tie as well.

Reid frowned, as he tilted his head, "The sleeve. It's very clever actually, and I assume that she designed it." Reid paused, as he frowned. "There are several dates and coordinates." he commented, looking it over with his eyes. "What's ATREYU? And why is Cullen linked with it?" he asked, frowning.

"There an organization, a band of brother's... the Khodevich's, six brothers who are assassins. Stuart Cullen was a member of the organization, that's why their linked. If they're involved in this, then the chances of finding her alive, just got smaller." Clyde spoke.

"Um… which one of you is Clyde Easter?"

The small group turned to see, a Caucasian male stood behind them, with two laptops sat in his hands.

"Lance Sucre, I presume." Clyde took the laptops from him, placing them on the table so he could shake the man's hand, "Glad you could make it. These are- Agent Hotchner, Doctor Reid and Technical Analyst Penelope Garcia." Clyde stopped suddenly, "You need to tell us everything you know about both Sarah Ward and Stuart Cullen."

Lance took a seat, and quickly began typing on one of the laptops, "About them in the CIA, or just anything I'll think will be helpful." The group nodded at him, "Well, you do know that Cullen's taken both Jon, her brother, and Zeke, a former band member don't you?" Lance saw the looks on their faces, "... I'd sent squads to their addresses to keep a look out, but they were already too late. That gives us three hostages."

Lance carried on telling the small group everything knew, while also getting up information on the two of them via his laptops.

Suddenly, a phone went off, beeping madly. Clyde looked down at the screen, seeing _'Sarah' _flash on the screen, "He has her mobile, Garcia be ready to try and trace it." Clyde answered, "Hello."

"Hello Clyde, nice to know you arrived safely... how was your trip from New York?" the indistinct voice rose into the thin air. "... I want to talk to Penelope, please put her on."

Clyde hesitated, before passing the phone to her, "H-hello?" she said, unsure and scared.

"Penelope." Stuart greeted. "I am about to send you a few links, which you will keep open for the duration of this adventure. It will be like a movie... a home movie!"

The links came up, as Garcia clicked on them, wishing she hadn't when she what they were holding, "Is this live streaming?" she questioned Cullen.

He chuckled, "Of course, who'd take me for."

On the screen, was a barely conscious looking Sarah, handing by her hands from binds connected to chains. Her face was already bruising, and blood was all over the front of her white shirt.

Clyde reached over snatching the phone away, "What have you done to her?" he demanded.

"Oh, relax buddy." Stuart laughed, "If you're wondering why she's slumped like that, blame the Ketamine. Hey... d'you like the new necklace I got her?"

Around Sarah's neck, it was very faint, was a spiked collar in which the spikes were penetrating her neck, causing the area to bleed.

Stuart chuckled, "It's surprising what you can find on _ebaY_, these days..."

"If you touch her, hurt her in anyway. I will find you and I will make sure it's your blood that's been spilled." Clyde spat, glaring at the screen.

"Clyde, don't make promises you can't keep. You already have to hold up one promise; don't jeopardize that one as well."

* * *

Dave and Emily walked toward Sarah's gate, seeing the neighbours looking very suspicious, as they made their way up the driveway. Once at the house, Dave pushed the door open, seeing the home completely trashed.

The two agents stepped inside, processing the scene in front of them.

"I came home at four and I saw the door open. I never knew she had a boyfriend." They turned a seeing an elderly man at the door, watching as his eyes looked at the room, "An angry one at least."

"Ron?" Dave asked, moving forward to shake his hand, "It's good to see you, but I'm afraid you'll have to leave, you can call the cops though as this is now an official crime scene. Have you touched anything?" Dave pressed.

Ron shook his head, "Nope, only the mat which I'm standin' on." He said, walking away.

"Okay... " Emily eyed the old man, "What was Cullen looking for?" Emily asked, seeing blood on the carpet.

"Prentiss." Dave called.

She turned seeing him crouched down, looking at a box with the name _'Tate'_ written on the front of it. "Tate... what's inside it?"

Dave pulled it open and his face dropped, "Films from the video camera. He's taken them as a form of emotional torture. Craig was always filming the kid, never wanting to miss a moment."

The box was completely empty, meaning Cullen had taken every single one.

"Rossi, we need to find out if she's got anything on Cullen around here... where would she keep it if she did?" Emily asked him, pulling on a pair of rubber gloves.

"She'd keep it close to her, the bedroom?" he suggested, making his way toward the stairs.

_Meanwhile in Florence, Colorado…_

A few wolf whistles were made, as the inmates of ADX Florence caught sight of Jennifer Jareau walking to the building along with a very angry looking Derek Morgan by her side.

"Come on, girl! You know you want some!" several inmates called over to JJ.

They were soon met by Warden Schofield, who greeted the two of them warmly, "Agent Morgan and Jareau— it's nice to be acquainted. I was surprised by the call that the FBI were in town but anyway, what can I do for you?"

Morgan looked at the man, "We want to know how Stuart Cullen escaped and successfully managed to take one of our agents hostage." he informed the Warden.

Schofield's face darkened suddenly, "Alright then, come with me." he led them away, "Cullen was a quiet one, he kept to himself. He wasn't very sociable... actually not at all. It made me very suspicious of what he was actually doing in his cell all the time."

JJ looked at the Warden, "Were there any members of your security staff helping him escape?" she questioned.

Schofield sighed, "Yes, I fired the three of them on the spot. They've all been taken to Buckingham Correctional Centre in Virginia."

Morgan glanced at JJ, "Jayje, we're gonna need to talk to them as well." he said, as she nodded.

Schofield led them into his office, holding the door open as they both walked in. "We have three boxes worth on Cullen. Most of it was before he was incarcerated."

"But was he always quiet?"

Schofield shook his head, "Up until 4 years ago, he was always fighting with the other inmates when they were all in the same room, but then he went quiet and didn't start anything anymore and kept to himself." Schofield closed his eyes, "Most of the time he refused to come out of his cell, we were convinced that he was terrified of the other inmates, which was understandable... not that he was planning to escape."

"We're gonna need to take all this back to Quantico and we're also gonna need the names of your staff who assisted his escape."

Schofield nodded, and quickly began writing on a piece of paper the three names, which could possibly lead them to something else.

_Back at Quantico…_

Hotch was pacing insanely, unable to keep still, "So, what do we actually know about Cullen?" he questioned, running a hand along his face.

"He's a Caucasian male, 39. He was born in New York, moved to Virginia in 1997, joined the CIA in that same year." Lance told Hotch. "He worked with Sarah for at least 4 years, before he was arrested and then later incarcerated."

"Uh, sir!" Garcia called, looking at her phone. "Morgan and Jayje, have three boxes to go over, which they're bringing back with them but are going to look over on the jet. They've also got three names who apparently helped Cullen to escape."

Hotch nodded, "Okay, Garcia?"

"Stan Harris, Cole Burns and Robert Moore." She read, "They're at Buckingham Correctional Centre."

Hotch turned to Clyde, "You coming or do you want to stay here?" he stopped, waiting for an answer.

"I'm coming." Clyde said, as he grabbed his jacket, following Hotch out of the room.


	9. Chapter 9

_218 Kings Road…_

Police officers were coating the area in which they'd been called to, as David Rossi and Emily Prentiss tried to find something helpful in the house they were in.

But so far it had been an unsuccessful search.

* * *

Sarah pulled her head up; she felt sick, dizzy, faint and tired.

But she had to stay awake, Cullen could do anything, and the worst thing to do would be to pass out.

Back at Quantico, Hotch, Clyde, Reid and Garcia were sat watching the screens, Lance watching it on his own.

They were all avidly watching the screens In front of them.

Cullen casually sauntered toward Zeke, grabbing him by the collar and forced him onto his knees.

"Revelation 20:10. And the devil, who deceived them, was thrown into the lake of burning sulfur, where the beast and the false prophet had been thrown. They will be tormented day and night for ever and ever."

Sarah's face changed, when she saw hissub-machine in his hands, being held tightly. "20:11. Then I saw a great white throne and him who was seated on it. The earth and the heavens fled from his presence, and there was no place for them." he paused, smirking, "20:12. And I saw the dead, great and small, standing before the throne, and books were opened. Another book was opened, which is the book of life. The dead were judged according to what they had done as recorded in the books."

Stuart took a deep breath, "Revelation 20:13. The sea gave up the dead that were in it, and death and Hades gave up the dead that were in them, and each person was judged according to what he had done." he looked at her, "Continue it."

"20:14. Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death." she paused, "20:15. If anyone's name was not found written in the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire."

And he fired his MP5KS, and the bullets connected with Zeke's chest. "No! NO!" she struggled in her binds, trying to break free. Blood caked her face, as she stared forward. "You son of a bitch!" she kept struggling.

Zeke's body fell to the floor, and then he let his finger press on the trigger, and he carried on shooting the body. "Stop it! STOP IT!" she demanded, panicking. Zeke was already dead, but he was doing it to get her to crack.

And she had.

Sarah was crying, and struggling to keep it together.

"Revelation 21:4. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away." Cullen stepped forward, wiping the tears from her eyes, "But we all know that's a lie."

Sarah glared at Stuart, as he smiled brightly at her.

* * *

Dave sighed, pulling out a metal suitcase, attempting to open it. But it was locked. He looked up at Emily and frowned, "Combination?" he questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"Try 'Tate'?" Emily suggested.

Dave pressed the buttons, but it still didn't open.

Emily tapped her foot, thinking. "1976? 2005?" Emily paused, "2009? 2008?" she'd just listened the death dates of both Craig and Tate... still nothing.

Dave sat back on his knees, "We're gonna have to take this back to Garcia and Reid... maybe they'll know something we don't." he collected the case into his hands and glanced at the room, "Do you think she'd keep anything else here?"

Emily also looked around, and nothing told her anything from Sarah's home at all, "Not really, we just have to hope everything we need is in that case."

"There could be anything in here, Emily."

Emily nodded, "I know, but it could be something we desperately need." she stated, as Dave began to walk out but stopped as he thought of one more thing.

"2000." he said, as he punched it in, and it heard a few clicks.

The lid lifted as Dave pulled out the papers inside it, "ATREYU..." he murmured, as his eyes widened. "Emily, we need to get this Hotch and Clyde now." he snapped it shut and picked it up.

Emily frowned, "What's in it?"

"A contact." Dave said, swallowing hard, "Which is keeping her alive."


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: So, Hotch and Clyde have decided to team up to try and salvage some evidence to help them in finding Cullen.**

**Hopefully, you all enjoy it!**

* * *

Hotch led the way, as Clyde tried his best to keep up with him.

Clyde eyes scanned the names on the piece of paper in front of him, _Stan Harris, Cole Burns and Robert Moore._

They met a guard, who was stood waiting for their arrival. "You two gentleman, must be from the FBI." he called out, moving to shake their hands, "I'm Sergeant Klein."

Hotch returned the handshake, "I'm Agent Hotchner, and this is Clyde Easter." Hotch introduced them, as they both shook hands.

"I'm afraid, you'll only be seeing two out of the three today, guys." Klein walked ahead of them, toward the interrogation rooms. "Harris, was found in his cell the other week."

"And, you're telling us this now?!" Clyde demanded, frowning deeply at the man.

"Well, I didn't know the FBI was gonna come down here and talk to them all, did I? Who do you think I am? Superman?" Klein retorted, staring Clyde down, harshly.

Hotch sighed, "Where are they?" he pressed, needing to know.

"Moore's that way, and Burns that way." Klein nodded to each direction.

"Clyde, you take Burns." Hotch stated, "I'll take Moore."

Klein rolled his eyes, "Good luck with Burns, he's a nasty little shit." Klein commented, walking off. "Cocky bastard."

It wasn't long before Clyde and Hotch separate and went different ways, toward the two men who could possibly give them the leads they so desperately needed.

Hotch stepped into a room, and saw a Caucasian male around late forties, sat chained to the table in front of him. "Hello, Mr Moore." he greeted, taking a seat opposite him.

"Agent Hotchner... from the Behavioral Analyst Unit, right?" Moore tilted his head, "I've read about you in the paper." he paused, "George Foyet was one gnarly guy, until he was caught."

Hotch nodded, "Do you know why're I'm here?" he asked, setting down his files.

Moore scoffed, "Let me guess... something about Stuart Cullen, I'm guessin'." he let out, rolling his eyes at the man in front of him.

"Your guess would be correct, you helped him escape did you not?" he questioned, placing several photos of Stuart, Sarah, Jon and Zeke in front of him.

"Yeah, so what? It did me no good." Moore let out, gruffly.

"Well... Cullen, has taken one of my agents hostage and I would like to know if you had any possible information which could benefit the both of us." Hotch suggested.

Moore narrowed his eyes at him, "No, you don't make the decisions in here, Agent Hotchner. You want my information, you have to agree to my terms. First." Moore lent forward, raising his hand, "Do we have a deal?"

_On the other side of the prison, in another interrogation room, Clyde wasn't having much luck either..._

"How long were you helping Cullen escape?"

Burns sighed and picked at his nails, "A while, I suppos'." he stated, shrugging.

"A while? That's useful." Clyde rolled his eyes, "Did he tell you his plans?" he pressed.

"So what if he did?" Burns replied, wanting to get to the man opposite him.

Clyde gritted his teeth together, "Then you better tell before things get real nasty." Clyde warned him.

Burns smirked, "I know you're here on information on where Stuart might have taken Sarah, Jon and Zeke." Burns stated.

"You better tell me what you know before I really do something I might regret."

Burns laughed, "Oh, really? Well, for your information, Mr Easter... I have no idea where Stuart is, I only helped him escape wearing a spare guards uniform. That's all I'm guilty of."

"What are you saying? You have no idea where Cullen is?" Clyde rose to his feet.

Burns cracked his neck and sighed, "That's exactly what I'm saying."

Clyde rolled his eyes, knowing that Burns was useless and that if they were to find anything out Moore would know than this asshole did. He hauled the door open and stalked out of the room.

It wasn't long before, he forced his way into the room where Hotch was talking with Robert Moore. "Where is he?!" he demanded, wrapping his arm around Moore's throat and applying a great force.

Hotch stood, alarmed, "Clyde." he called, looking up at the man, "We've got something."

Clyde slowly released the man's neck, seeing Hotch pull out his cell. "Garcia, pull up any recent receipts for Ace Hardware... that was Cullen's first trip once he escaped. Get back to me as soon as you can." he hung up, and he gaze fell on Moore, "Do you know where he planned to take them?" he quizzed the man.

Moore shook his head, "No, he never got that far with me, Stan knew his whole plan." he stated, "But the guy's dead, so that's all I know." Moore answered, sighing.

Clyde let out an agitated groan, "So, basically we're no closer to get this asshole?" he stalked back out of the room.

Hotch rolled his eyes, "Sorry about him, thank you for you cooperation, Mr Moore." Hotch shook his hand. "I'm very grateful, and hopefully we can find Cullen." Hotch turned to walk out of the room.

"Agent Hotchner!" Moore called to him, as Hotch turned to back. "I never knew what he was gonna do when he got out... I'm so sorry."

* * *

"Have you ever watched the show '_24'_?"

Sarah watched Stuart, "Yes." she spoke.

"Good." he grinned, pulling her up, and attaching her cuffs to a hanging cable, before pulling it tightly, so she was barely able to touch the ground with her feet, "Do you remember the episode were Bauer was taken hostage and tortured endlessly, with a scalpel bathed in Sulfuric acid by Ronnie Stark? It was in the earlier series."

Sarah's face became emotionless, knowing what his plan was.

Stuart picked up a piece of wood, "Bite this." he said, forcing it into her mouth, as he hands trailed down to her shirt, he slit it open with the knife in his hands. "Let's see which member of your team is most valuable to you."

He picked up the scalpel; it glistened with acid, as a grin plastered his lips and it reflected off of it, shining into her eyes. "Who first... " he pulled her shirt open, revealing her skin.

"Emily Prentiss... what about her?" Stuart studied her face, her eyes not moving, as she stared directly back at him. He knew she was close to only a few team members, he just wanted to see if his theories were true. "Hm-mm, not so much." he cut her a little, smirking as he saw the pain cross her face.

Sarah blinked, feeling the pain shoot through her body, causing her to flinch both mentally and physically. She gritted her teeth, clenching her fists as she took the pain.

She had never been a fan of Sulfuric acid, and her impressions weren't about to change... especially not now.

"Jennifer Jareau?" he watched, waiting for something but nothing came, "Alright." he cut across her torso, smirking as he did.

Sarah closed her eyes, and breathed slowly as an attempt to calm herself down.

"How about Doctor Spencer Reid? He's a clever kid, but not as clever as you, though." he taunted, "A bit of an idiot when he rambles on about nothing." he cut her again, a little deeper than before. "How about the lovely Penelope? Everyone loves her... "

Sarah brow moved at her name, and he smirked, "Ooh, alright." he cut across her again, enjoying himself. "Penelope always puts a smile on everyone's face, because she's that type of person."

"Who next?" he ran the blade over her torso lightly, "Dave? What about Dave. I know you love him like your own father. What if something were to happen to him, when he wasn't so cautious?" his eyes shined, as he cut her yet again.

Blood cascaded down her body, staining her once clean skin. It glistened in the dim lit room, exposed the flesh that hid beneath the already deep cuts.

Stuart sighed, picking a space on her body, "Derek Morgan. Now you two share a past. I mean Karl Buford and Dennis Archer were the same people when you think about it. Although Archer had fantastic taste." he whispered. "Look, he chose you. Little Miss Sunshine." he taunted, chuckling darkly.

Sarah lurched forward, moving her legs so she hit him in the groin area, glaring harshly.

Stuart chuckled, standing up straight, "You really shouldn't have done that." he sighed, forcing the scalpel down the center of her abdomen, and ripped it back out again. "And our last member Aaron Hotchner? Who's he to you?"

Sarah facial features fell, as Stuart smiled, "Oh, that's soft subject." he reached for a bucket, "Well, he's a soft subject in general." she stared at him, not wanting him to carry on with Hotch at all, "And of course you love his son, Jack."

That tore a snag as she kicked him in the abdomen.

"Sweetheart, lets cleanse that wound of yours." and then he poured the bucket over her body.

Sarah's eyes nearly flung themselves out of their sockets, as her body throbbed in sheer pain. Her cuts were stinging madly, bringing tears to her eyes, as she winced constantly. Her head was spinning, her heart going ten to the dozen, struggling to keep going as the pain was inflicted upon her person.

He stared, before pressing a finger to her wound which sat on her stomach, "I know they're so desperate to find you. They're looking for you, but that doesn't mean they'll find you. They may know my name, but they don't know... not like you do."

Sarah looked barely conscious, her arms keeping her up right, as she struggled to breath normally. Her skin was burning uncontrollably. She wanted to stop it, but she couldn't. She felt so weak and helpless.

Sluggish.

Weakened.

Powerless.

"Now, choose a member of your team to die."


	11. Chapter 11

_"Now, chose a member of your team to die."_

The words rung through Sarah's ears, as she looked at the man. She gritted her teeth, and shook her head, "No."

Stuart smiled, reaching for a long cattle prod which was propped up against a wooden panel. "Tell me, and this will go a lot easier." he ordered, but she stayed quiet. He rolled his eyes and forced his fist into her stomach.

"Tell me!" he exclaimed with rage before throwing yet another forceful hit into her abdomen.

Blood was swamping Sarah's mouth, dripping from her lips as she spat it out, almost choking on the thick syrup-like liquid.

"All you have to do is name someone, it doesn't matter who... as long as you name someone." Stuart said. "I'm waiting."

Jon rolled over, sitting up slowly, "Sar, just say a freakin' name!" he shouted- no screamed.

Stuart smirked, "Your brother is a smart man," he lifted the prod, "You see this? This is an Electro Shock Baton, but I made it my own. A shock from this; can be extremely painful, but not enough to kill you. So tell me what I want." he turned it on, as she spat more blood out. "Because, I can keep going and going."

"You'll have to kill me first." and then the baton touched her stomach, sending a violent shock through her already fragile body.

Garcia rose to her feet, and backed away from her screens as Hotch and Clyde stayed, still watching.

They footage showed Cullen shocked Sarah until she appeared barely conscious.

"You'll... have to kill me."

The cattle prod touched her stomach again, and she suddenly slumped.

Garcia paced around her lair. "That wouldn't kill her right?" she questioned in a slow panic, wanting to know what was going to happen to her friend.

Hotch frowned, as he stood back and looking at the blank screen that was in front of them.

"No, that wasn't his intention." Clyde told her. "It's a form of torture to get what he wants, but she's too stubborn to give in that easily."

"But, t- then he could kill her... out of anger." Garcia concluded, looking between the two men.

Hotch and Clyde shared a worried look, "Let's hope he doesn't."

* * *

"Ooh, that'll leave a mark. I got you good didn't I?" He taunted, bringing her around. He lifted up her top, showing the burn mark.

"You could say that," She rolled over, spitting out more blood. "Tell me their numbers, and I will stop," She sat herself up, looking pasty white.

"I'm not going to tell you anything, because you'll have to kill me first," she stood up, as he smiled at her.

"You're so awkward," He turned the baton on, as Sarah looked at it. "Sarah, all you have to do is give me on damn name, is it really that hard?"

She stared at him and spat out more blood, "I said no."

Stuart moved away from her, "I also found these at your house, I hope you don't mind, but I borrowed them. Now, we've got loads to go through, which is gonna be fun for me," he opened a box and loaded DVD onto his laptop, as it showed up on the screen, showing at video of her, Craig and a baby.

Tate.

He carried on playing them to get a reaction out of her, when he came to the last one... he did.

_"Say, hi to the camera, kiddo!" Came the happy voice of Craig, turning it on. _

_"Hi," He grinned at it, waving. _

"Oh my... I can't," Garcia got up, moving away from the screens.

_"Show mommy what we made her, with Uncle Jon's help," He spoke, as Tate handed Sarah a book. _

_"__Okay, what've you been doing behind my back?" She frowned, as she sat on the hospital bed, next to her son. _

_"Open it!" Tate encouraged, as she raised her hands into the air. _

_"Okay, okay, hold your horses, jeez," She joked, opening it, and looking through it. "Is this everyone? You made a collage of…" She trailed off. _

_"Of all the best people in the world, keep going, I'm Superman!" Craig stated. _

_"Dad, you're ruining it!" Tate frowned at him, as Craig chuckled. _

_"Oops, sorry," He grinned, as he held the camera over the book, showing its pages._

_The other camera was on Sarah, as she watching the video; her face stayed straight, nothing changed. "Mom, you're gonna love the last page," Tate spoke, as she smiled. _

_"Well, I'm not there yet, Mr Impatient," She teased, flicking through. "Jon as Batman? Yeah right," She scoffed. "He cane barely lift a single weight."_

_"You're nearly there," Tate jumped with energy. She stopped at the last page, as I watched a tear fall from her eye, as she watched. "Wonder woman. Wonder woman? I don't have black hair, mister," She eyed her son, as he shrugged. _

_"__So, who cares, you remind me of her, dad said she's honest and kind, which is what you are, and you're a big kid as well," Tate said, as she smiled at him. _

_"Well, then Wonder Woman is just fine," She told him, kissing his head, as it went off._

"Well, wasn't that sweet? Wonder Woman? I'd consider you more of a Black Canary type of woman," he told her, as she looked down.

"You were lucky, because I did wanna find the book,but I thought I'd settle for you and these," he taunted, as he reached for a random one, and placing his hands on each end of it, threatening to snap it.

"No!" came her voice, which made him stop. "Don't, please don't... I'll do anything, just don't." he whispered, as he walked toward her. "It's all I have left," tears were free falling from her eyes now, as he chuckled.

"Here we go, some actual emotion... I wouldn't actually do that, I'm not that cold honey," he hummed, as she let the tears fall. "You could have saved him," he told her, as she looked at him.

"That's what I liked to believe I could've done," Sarah replied, sitting up and wincing in pain.

"You could've have at least tried to help your own son!" he shouted at her, glaring.

She gritted her teeth, "We agreed that we didn't want him to suffer, by putting him in more pain than he was already in," she let out.

Jon shifted as he spoke. "Sar, you don't have to tell him," She looked at her brother.

"No, he wants to know." she smiled at Jon, before looking at Stuart, "We sat down and talked with him, about what we could do and what he wanted, because we wanted it to be his choice, not mine, not Craig's. His. All he said was that he wanted the pain to go away, and he didn't want to see me cry anymore." she spoke, remembering her son's words.

"A five year old wouldn't say that," Stuart stated.

"How would you know? You never knew him, you never met him," she stated.

"You did pick Seb up didn't you?" he taunted, as Jon glared at him, as Stuart walked around the room..

"I swear, if you touch my kid!" Jon exclaimed, going mad with anger.

"He's nothing to do with it," she defended, as he pressed his hand against her chest, as she screamed louder this time while he applied more pressure.

"But he's to do with you, therefore he's to do with me," Sarah's face went paler by the second.

"I swear if you touch him, I will end you," she warned, looking up at the man with pure repulsion and anger.

Stuart chuckled, "Ooh, was that a threat?" he tilted his head.

"No, it's a promise."


	12. Chapter 12

Stuart quickly ran down the basement stairs, a smile on his face. "Jon! They've found Gretchen's body!" Stuart announced loudly, sending him a smirk.

Jon glared at him, "You bastard." he swore, spitting at Stuart.

Stuart crouched down in front of him and tutted. "You should be lucky Sebastian's not dead." he let out, taking a step back as Jon lashed out and tried to kick him with his bound legs.

"You leave him alone!"

Stuart danced with excitement, "It seems Clyde Easter took him away from my grasp." he sent Sarah look, "That persistent British snob."

"Jon, ignore him." Sarah told her younger brother, "He gets off on the taunting." she promised, not breaking eye contact.

"Oh, and you'd know all about that would you?" he called, moving to Sarah and standing behind her. "I've got something special for you, Sweet heart." he whispered, running his hands along her bare abdomen. "How about we make you another little one, huh?"

Jon gritted his teeth, "I swear to God, if you dare touch her in that way... I will rip you apart!" he exclaimed.

Stuart nodded, "Sure, you will." he agreed, still allowing his hands to roam over Sarah's body.

"You're askin' for it, you sick son of a bitch!" Jon demanded, rolling over into the pool of thick blood in front of him.

"Jon, you really better shut up before it's your blood on the floor." Stuart warned, not letting go of his grip on Sarah's waist.

"Leave him out of it." she spoke quietly, her throat dry and raspy.

Stuart watched Jon, as his hands trailed to the top of Sarah's trousers, where they played with the hem.

"Don't you dare!" Jon lost it and began ranting and swearing at Stuart.

Stuart let go of Sarah and walked toward a table and pulling a bag open, "I'm gonna make you shut it." he pulled out a carving knife and stalked toward Jon, who was thrashing around on the ground.

He took a strong hold of his collar of shirt and pulled him up. The blade of the knife touched his neck and he was ready swipe it along in one brisk movement if it weren't for Sarah's plea.

"Don't, please." she let out, "Sebastian needs someone, don't do it. Do whatever you want to me but don't harm my brother." she spoke, tears already forming in her eyes.

Stuart looked up at her and sighed, "You have three minutes to say your goodbye's."

"Sar- " Jon paused and he gulped, knowing he was going to die. "Look after him. Sebastian needs someone who will always be there... and that's you." Jon tried to stop himself from crying, as he said a tearful goodbye to his only sister, whom he loved more than anyone.

"Jon, I don't think I can handle another kid... not that I don't love Seb to bits... " she bit out, holding back the tears. "I- I can't."

Jon smiled, "I know he's different, he's very opinionated and stubborn." he paused again, "J- just give him a good life- a happy one." he told her, "You can do that, I know you can..."

Sarah opened her mouth but words refused to come out, and so she closed it again.

And then the blade slowly swept along the skin, causing blood to fly, splatter and spray everywhere.

"I will kill you! You son of a bitch!

The metal clanging sound echoed as Stuart dropped the knife and walked toward Sarah, quickly untying her. "C'mon, girlie. You want a kid, I'll give you a kid." he took a strong hold of her arm, "And then I'm gonna take a little trip to Ace Hardware."

* * *

JJ stepped back from the screens, feeling sickened. "I can't believe he just did that." she let out, repulsed. Cullen had just killed Sarah's brother, right in front of her...

"He's a sick son a bitch, that's why, Jayje." Morgan stated, sighing as he stared ahead.

Dave was pacing widely, "He's gotta give at some point, he can't keep running from us." Dave demanded, becoming agitated.

Clyde turned to Sucre, "Lance, have an agent pick up Sebastian from Gretchen's mother's house, here's the address." Clyde handed him a post-it-note quickly.

Spencer's head shot up, as he replayed the last couple of seconds over in his head, remembering something that Stuart had said. "Guys, we've got it."

Hotch frowned, "What?"

"Cullen just gave away his game."

Emily sighed, "Reid, what did he say?" she pressed, crossing her arms over her chest.

Spencer rolled his eyes, "You missed it... all of you missed it." he looked at everyone and then his eyes fell on an angry Clyde. "Cullen clearly said he was going to go to Ace Hardware after. Ace Hardware." he turned to Garcia, "Where's the nearest stores?"

Garcia quickly began typing, Lance also doing the same knowing two would be better than one. "The nearest store is ten minutes away, the other is eighteen minutes away, I've sent both addresses to your cells already."

Clyde rose to his feet, "Right, we need a SWAT team. Morgan, Hotch, Dave and myself will go to one." he said, walking out of the room, leaving the team to their thoughts. "Reid, you Emily and Jayje to the other, along with another SWAT team."

Hotch, Dave and Morgan looked at each other and nodded, soon following Clyde.

"That poor little mite." Garcia cooed, referring to Sebastian. The kid was only six years old and he'd lost both of his parents to a murderer, who didn't give a care in the world. "He's not alone... you're not alone."

* * *

The faint sound of pleasured groans escaped Stuart's mouth as he thrusted contently, enjoying every moment of having dominance of the woman he'd despised for a very long time.

Sarah stared at the ceiling of her father's bedroom, several emotions flooding through her body gently pulsating through her mind.

Abhorrence.

Malice.

Repugnance.

They were similar emotions she felt when George Foyet had violated her in the exact same way, as a last resort to try and gain some dominance. Her head was hurting terribly and she struggling to even breath properly, which was down to the beatings Cullen had forced upon her.

She felt so weak and powerless, and she hated the feeling but what could she do?

Nothing.

The grasp on her waist tightened, as he went faster, not faltering for a second while he violently assaulted her. He didn't see it like she did; rape. Stuart saw it as a very hopeful opportunity for Sarah fall pregnant and get what she wanted so badly; a child.

He slowly pulled back and quickly zipped his trousers up, straightening his shirt. "Right, let's go." he yanked her up, and did up her trousers.

She was pushed out of the room and forced down the stairs, barely managing to walk straight.

Once the two of them returned to the basement, Stuart pulled the cable down again and bound Sarah's again. "See you soon." he smiled, before launching a fist into her chest, weakening her even more.

_Meanwhile at Ace Hardware..._

The four men hopped out of the SUV, they'd arrived in and turned to the SWAT team behind them, "Cover all exits and entrances." Clyde paused, "Morgan take the west exit, Dave the east. Hotch and I have the front covered." he said, as they separated.

It wasn't long before a possible sighting of their ideal vehicle pulled into the car park.

A hooded figure jumped out of the driver's side and quickly locked the car as he made his way toward the store. The man walked into the store soundlessly and disappeared from both Hotch and Clyde's sight.

"Was that a possible I.D. on Stuart Cullen?" Hotch asked as he brought his wrist up to his mouth.

Clyde frowned, "It's debatable, I didn't a get a clear shot on his face. I'll have to check the car." the ex SIS officer made a run toward the car he'd pulled up and quickly peered through the window and froze.

On the passenger seat sat a sub-machine gun, left unmasked.

Clyde then brought his wrist up to his mouth, "He's our guy, move it. Move in."

Inside the store, Morgan and Dave began closing in from opposite ends and met in the middle, quickly dividing again to seep through the aisles to see where Cullen was.

However, on the opposite side on the store, Cullen was looking at spades to purchase. He was handling a heavy steel model as he heard muffling from the aisles on either side of him.

And then he realized that something was definitely going on.

"Stuart Cullen!" he turned and spotted the kind face of David Rossi, who was a holding his firearm at him. "Put the spade down, and allow me to arrest you."

"Hi, Dave!" Stuart greeted, "I love your dog, Mudgie... but you prefer to call her Mudg, don't you?" he taunted, taking a step back and dropping the spade. He turned on his heel and made a run for it, sprinting down the aisles.

Dave pulled his wrist to his mouth, "Morgan, he's on the run, going down aisle 12." Dave shouted.

Morgan ran, forgetting completely about his gun which was still sat securely in it's holster. He managed to spot Cullen turning down another aisle and quickly began to pick up speed just to get to him in time.

Cullen noticed this, and began flinging objects off of the shelves as an attempt to put Morgan off and give him more time.

But Morgan dodged the objects easily and carried on chasing Cullen down.

He ran through the entrance doors, forcing them open and hitting the wall hard.

Morgan followed him through, the doors hitting him as he did and he took a chance. He lept and managed to grab Cullen's left ankle, pulling him to the floor. He climbed on top of him, and sat on his lower back, quickly restraining him before pulling him up again.

"Karma's a real bitch."


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: Stuart Cullen's face claim would have to be someone who resembled the looks of Danny Pino? I just like the guy, and I think he's extremely attractive in many different ways.**

**And I think- to me, he suits the role of Stuart Cullen... I don't know why but it just fits? But as always, it's up to you all on how you picture Stuart Cullen.**

**Remember the last installment? Stuart got ambushed by a "flying" Derek Morgan, who took him down easily and beat him to a pulp before he was forced away from the guy. But now it's time to get down the business and interrogate the guy...**

* * *

Stuart sat in the fairly large interrogation room, his hands chained beneath the table; his emotions racing through his body shifting between absolute distress and amusement. Just hours earlier, he was a free man- or so his subconscious thought anyway, but the FBI had ambushed him while entering Ace Hardware. He didn't put up any fight, even if his instinct told him to run... his intelligence had other ideas and so he simply dropped to his knees.

But to him, if was more fun to run... it made it harder for the cops but in the end it didn't make it any easier for him.

It had been Derek Morgan who had taken him down, he remembered his face from his first visit to the BAU. When Stuart was hauled to his feet, he recognized the man's face full of pure anger and hatred.

Stuart couldn't even remember how long he'd been sat there debating his options or plan of action, but he was brought out of his thoughts, when the same agent walked into the room, "Look who it is... Derek Morgan." he smirked, "Hello."

"Do you know why you are here?" were Morgan's first words.

"When you arrested me, I believe Agent Hotchner mentioned something about a murder of one of your agents?" Stuart frowned, "How's your mother, Fran?" Stuart taunted.

Morgan ignored the taunt, "When we arrested you, neither Agent Hotchner nor any member of my team mentioned anything about a murder. We arrested you on suspicion of the abducting of a federal agent." Morgan corrected, folding his arms across his chest.

He watched as the agent opened up a file and slid over a shining photo. He knew who it was without needing to look at it, but if he wanted to keep his act, he knew he'd have to. Stuart's eyes looked down, as he saw the woman he was obsessed with.

Sarah Jessica Ward.

"You know where she is, don't you?" the agent questioned, watching as Stuart tried to look away.

Stuart bit his cheek, "She looks real happy."

Morgan gritted his teeth, "Stuart, you and Sarah worked together for four years... we found your DNA all over her home." he stated, "Now, I will ask you again. Do you know where she is?"

Stuart stopped and stared him, raising an eyebrow. He was running and for the first time, he'd just realized he was tired. He didn't want to run anymore. "I've seen her." he nodded.

"When?"

Stuart squinted, "... This morning." he answered.

"What did you do to her?" Morgan quizzed, leaning forward.

Stuart sighed and took a deep breath, "I killed her." he admitted, "I killed her, because she's a bitch, and she deserved it. I offered her another child and she threw it back in my face. Her body was just waiting to be dismember into tiny pieces... that saw had my name written all over it."

Morgan stopped and Stuart could've sworn his saw tears glaze the mans eyes, and he then expected to him yell or scream at him at least.

"Y- you killed her?"

Stuart rolled his eyes, "That's what I said didn't I?" he retorted, leaning back in his chair, despite his chained hands.

"You killed my friend." Morgan let out quietly.

"Oh, come on, get over it." Stuart scoffed, "She wasn't that special... she deceived all of you."

_To protect us._ Morgan wanted to say but he chose against it, "Where is she?" he said instead, still not looking up at him yet.

"What?" Stuart creased his face up in confusion.

"Where did you leave her?" Morgan's voice slowly escalated as he rose to his feet, towering above Stuart. "Where is her body?!"

Stuart looked up at him, smirking.

Derek Morgan's face was burning red, he was sweating and shaking. "Derek, I think you loved her." Stuart announced. "That's the worst thing that could possibly happen to you... I mean it happened to me and look where I turned up?" he paused, "She picks up, and then throws you away when she's bored with you."

Morgan's eyes glistened, as he thought about what Cullen had just told him. Sarah was supposedly dead... and apparently he loved her. He couldn't deny that there were feelings surrounding her, yes he felt something. "Where is she?"

Stuart sighed, "I'm not a stupid man, you want her body that bad... you take that death penalty away." he spoke. "I'll tell you where she is, but only if you agree to my terms."

"No deal." Morgan suddenly slammed his hands down on the table and evidently causing Stuart to flinch, "Where is she, you son of a bitch?!" he demanded, moving toward the man's side.

"I bet your mother's peach cobbler is to die for." Stuart whispered, imagining it and licking his lips.

Morgan quickly retaliated and wrapped his arm around Stuart's throat, "Where is she? And you better answer otherwise you neck will be broken." he warned, seeing the door swing open. "And then I'll put you out of your misery!"

"Morgan."

"Agent Hotchner!" Stuart called, smiling at the man, "How's Jack?"

"How'd you kill her?" he called back at Stuart.

Stuart smirked, "Well, I didn't slit her throat, like her brother... didn't shoot her to death, like Zeke." he paused, breathing out a sigh, "I tortured her to death, until her heart gave out from all the shocks she was receiving. It was riveting." Stuart slowly looked up, seeing the look on Agent Hotchner's face as well. He also had tears in his eyes. "Then, I cut her like a leg of lamb... succulent and juicy."

Hotch stared at him, "So, where's her body?" he questioned, not really convinced by Stuart's game.

Stuart looked down, knowing that now was the time to give up everything, there was no point in hiding anymore... it was getting him nowhere. "She's at her father's place... in Virginia." he let out.

Stuart had never seen a man move so fast, even when he was working for the CIA. Agent Hotchner ripped out his cell and was shouting orders here and there. Morgan slowly let go of his grasp around his neck and walked toward the door, slamming it shut.

Hotch quickly returned though, carrying a new pair of hand cuffs. "You're coming with us, just so we're certain you're not playing little mind games with us, Cullen." Hotch forced him up on his feet. "You better hope the crap coming from your mouth is the truth." he said, pushing him out of the room.


	14. Chapter 14

Clyde ran ahead of the team, desperate to find her before it was too late. Something in back of him mind kept telling him that she was going to pull through- that she couldn't be dead and that she wouldn't give up.

He rounded a corner, seeing Sarah's prone form hanging for the cuffs, which connected her to a strong chain, which hung from the ceiling. She was completely out of it, and was barely able to stand properly.

Clyde set the chain down, and caught her body before she hit the ground below, "Sarah."

She pulled away from him, blinking madly as her eyes found the body of her brother who was still lying on the stone floor.

Sarah dropped to her knees.

Her hands moved through syrup-like liquid, as they pulled the head toward her chest, which cradled it quietly. Her whole body gradually began to shake, not with sorrow though- with pain, agony, anger... pure anger. Her once warm eyes darkened, her demeanor changed. Her heartbeat slowed, and her eyes met the man who had caused this agony. Her pupils dilated as she concentrated on his face, tensing her jaw.

Stuart Cullen.

She placed her brother's dead, prone form on the floor gently, "I'm so sorry." and then she slowly rose to her feet. Her hands dripped with blood, her white shirt now a deep crimson.

Stuart slowly retreated backwards, grabbing a loose Sub-machine gun and made a run for it, down a dark hall as a last resort.

She quickly broke into a sprint and shot after the man, leaving the rest of the team there. Despite the pain vibrating from her head, chest and abdomen, she ran for her life to chase that man down.

Stuart glanced back, seeing her on his tail and he chuckled. His feet suddenly miss judged the path ahead and he tripped, falling quickly.

Hands grabbed his neck from behind, taking a strong hold on his neck and slowly, but tightly squeezed hard there.

Stuart struggled to get his breath, and he began throwing his arms around and his hands locked themselves into her hair, yanking hard. He lowered his neck, and quickly bit down hard on her arm.

She winced and let go out of the pain, stepping back to clutch her head.

He quickly glanced around, seeing a plank of wood. He took a strong grasp and swung it around, and it hit the back of her head, causing her to fall to the floor again.

Blood leaked from her head, as Sarah fell onto her knees.

"I'm going to end you." Stuart announced, pulling her up. He carried on hitting her with the wood, which was now in his left hand and being held tightly.

Sarah soon fell to the floor again, unable to even stand properly.

Hearing the echoing sound of footsteps, Stuart took a strong hold of her caramel hair and pulled her against his chest, pressing his gun into her left shoulder.

The team, along with Clyde ran around a corner and moved so they were surrounding Cullen. "Drop the gun, Cullen!" Hotch shouted, his grip tightening on his own weapon.

He chuckled, "Hm-mm, no chance." he shouted, pushing his gun into Sarah's left shoulder, causing her wince. "You move, the next bullet out of this gun goes through her before it gets to me."

It became a staring competition almost, as Morgan stared at Cullen endlessly.

Suddenly, a gunshot rung through the air, as both Stuart and Sarah fell, a pool of blood quickly appearing. "You bitch!" Stuart exclaimed, "You pulled the freakin' trigger!"

Her dark eyes flickered toward the chain still attached to her wrist. She looked back at Stuart, who was groaning in pain, she caught sight of the team and then she spotted Clyde stood behind them, who nodded at her.

"They're after you, Sarah." Stuart called out, choking on his own blood. "Khodevich..."

Sarah rolled over, wrapping the chain around Cullen's neck tightly. She felt hands struggle around her own, attempting to pry her off of his neck but she was refusing to budge or even let her hold of the chain slip.

The chain tightened around his neck, but Stuart was still breathing so she wrapped her arm around his neck and tensed, squeezing harsher this time.

No one off of the team even stepped forward to stop her, they were allowing her to kill a man out of cold blood.

His face was beginning to go dark red to a faint purple shade, as he began to run out of air.

Not wanting to waste anymore time, she moved her arm in one swift movement and quickly snapped his neck and insistently killing him instantly. As she let go of the body, a sharp ache surged with her body which made her feel extremely weak.

Sarah looked down at her chest, completely forgetting about the gunshot wound there, and saw blood running down her stomach.

Clyde immediately ran over to her, pulling her away from Cullen. "Sarah." he murmured, pulling her into his arms. He took in her face, seeing it battered beyond compare. Her usual olive complexion combined with her perfect features were a mess. Bruises here, there and everywhere. "Oh, darling." Clyde lifted her into his arms, sending the blood everywhere.

"Hey, Easter Bunny."

His eyes trailed downward, looking at her slightly open eyes, "Sarah, you hang on for old Easter Bunny." he told her, as she winced.

"I feel... sick. My head is throbbing, and I can't feel my shoulder."

He frowned at her words and checked, seeing her hair caked with blood, which had soaked his shirt. "No, e- everything's fine, you're going to be fine." he promised, moving her past the team. "You're fine, I promise you."

Morgan rushed past and slowed as he approached Cullen's dead form, a pool of blood around his chest, showing where the bullet had gone in but an also very prominent red mark appearing at his neck. He then remembered what he'd seen just minutes before... _His eyes then fell onto the other bodies of Zeke... and Jon._

_Zeke, was caked with multiple gunshots over his torso and head, the guy didn't deserve any of that._

_And Jon, well his throat had been slit to oblivion. His eyes were wide open, staring up at nothing._

_Derek Morgan slowly knelt down, biting his lips, moving his hand forward and closed the lifeless eyes of Jonathan Ward._

Outside was another story, Clyde Easter was currently attempting to resuscitate an unresponsive Sarah. "I need medical attention! Quickly!" he shouted in a while panic, and attempted to resuscitate her again but this time it worked.

"Clyde..." her panicked eyes clapped on his warm ones. "If something happens-"

He shook his head, "Do not talk like that, you are not dead." he warned, as she was taken into the ambulance. "And you're going to die, either!"

"Listen. I want you to tell my family-" she was cut off again.

"I'm sure your parents know-"

Sarah shook her head, "No... my real family." she corrected, referring to the BAU. "You have to tell them that none of this is their fault." she said, wincing.

The EMT frowned, "Miss Ward, where is the pain?" he asked, looking down at her.

Sarah frowned, "My chest." he opened her shirt, seeing it badly cut up, and bleeding. "I-I can't breathe... properly." she sucked in another deep breathe, wincing his utter pain. "I think it's a Hemopneumothorax... my head is throbbing." she whispered, closing her eyes.

"Sarah, no. Keep your eyes open!" Clyde called to her, as he saw Dave rushing over, Hotch on his tail. "Don't you dare close your eyes. And not on me."

"For god's sake, I told you what was wrong and you're prodding my legs." she shouted, but the recoiled in pain, and clutched her head tightly. "Shit... head. Head." she murmured.

Clyde reached and took her head in his hands to get a better look at it. "She's right, there was a lot of blood coming from her head, the back of her head. I assume she must've been hit pretty bad." Clyde stated, as Dave climbed into the ambulance.

Hotch went to climb in as well, but the EMT stopped him, "Sir, you can't ride with us, only two passengers." he said, as Clyde looked back.

Dave turned back to him, "Hold the fort."

"Clyde." Hotch heard her call, as she reached for Easter's hand.

And then the doors closed in his face.

* * *

Clyde ran along with the EMT's, looking panicked and he spotted the team already in the waiting room.

He and Dave turned to them, "She crashed... twice."

"But she's alive, right?" Morgan questioned, pushing past Hotch so he was in front of Clyde and Dave.

"They haven't rushed her straight into surgery yet, but finger's crossed she'll be fine." Dave replied, sitting down in the waiting room.

Both Morgan and Clyde looked at him, "There's no finger's crossed about it, she's not gonna die." they both complained, glaring at the older man.

"Charge 300! She's crashing!" Hotch froze, as he saw Doctor Hansen, the attending Oliver had employed as their family doctor. He shocked her, and she came back, "Right, get an O.R prepped!" he ordered.

"What? You don't know what's wrong yet!" another ordered. "Do you even know who she is?!"

Hansen stopped, "Yes, I do. She is Sarah Jessica Ward. And I believe she has a slight Brain Aneurysm, which are hereditary in the family and a Hemopneumothorax. I am her attending, prep her!" he shouted, getting angry.

"Hansen." he stopped as Sarah called his name.

"Yeah?" he asked, frowning.

Her breathing was ragged and strained as she spoke, "Do what you have to do." Sarah told him, her eyes not even open but she was barely conscious.

"You're going to be fine." he promised.

Emily frowned, seeing JJ, Reid and Garcia rush toward them, "All we can do now is wait." she told the large group.

An hour.

The team were gathered in the waiting room. All tense, and minds racing.

Morgan was sat on the floor, staring ahead, banging the back of his head against the wall, trying to keep sane. He couldn't lose his Sweet Pea... she still had to talk him through his guitar lessons... and to teach him_ "Cult of Personality."_

Reid was tapping his foot, he was nervous. He'd been in this position numerous times and it got worse every time. He was working out possibly outcomes that may be lying ahead in the darkness.

Garcia was sobbing quietly, unable to stop the tears falling. She loved Sarah so much, and she couldn't bear to lose such a great friend. She couldn't get her mind around why Cullen would want to even hurt her like that in the first place, she was such a good person... to so many people.

JJ and Emily were sat together, in silence not speaking, not moving. Hand in hand. The same action they'd been seen doing when it was Garcia lying in the hospital, not Sarah.

They were both left to their thoughts and their minds which both held unwilling thoughts of the fate of their friend.

Hotch was pacing back and forth between the team, he couldn't keep still. He didn't want to leave her side, and now he had no idea what was going on. He'd been so careless and stupid to even think about letting her out of his sight in the first place.

Dave walked in, his phone in hand, "Jessica's on her way, she'll be here in 15 minutes." he said, the only one talking.

And it fell silent again.

It was the wait, it was killing them. They were anxious, worried, terrified of the consequences which were lying just around the corner, making all light and hope seem inevitable.

* * *

"Dave!"

Dave turned, seeing Jessica walking toward the group, "She's still in surgery, we haven't heard anything yet."

She looked around the room, seeing the team all in their own worlds. "They're just in shock and are worried more than anything." Dave reassured her. "Where's Oliver?"

"He's catching the quickest flight from Melbourne." Jessica answered. "And he's picking up Chris from Pakistan." she added, biting back the tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

The door opened, and Dwight Hansen walked out.

He was a grey haired man, around Dave's age, who looked extremely tired but full of energy. "Jessica." he greeted, nodding. "Right, Sarah is fine. She developed a Hemopneumothorax ; pneumothorox and hemothorax, but I drained all the blood and air, which was not allowing her to breath freely, from her chest cavity. I'm still a bit cautious of her abdomen though, and the deep wounds on it... they're very severe and there is scarring that I cannot remove." he paused, "The good new is there was no need from an open Craniotomy, as she didn't occur a brain aneurysm. Although, there is severe head trauma... and that gunshot in her shoulder gave her quite a run-in." he sighed, looking at everyone. "She won't be awake for at least an hour, though."

"So, she's alright?" Jessica asked, panic flashed across her face... more prominent this time.

"Yes, but we should hope for the best." Hansen said, slowly.

Morgan breathed a sigh of relief, "Oh, man." his voice was shaky. He ran a hand along his shaven head, letting it fall into his lap as he calmed himself.

"Can we see her?" Garcia pressed, wiping her eyes, standing up.

Hansen smiled at the woman, "Of course." he nodded, gestured to the right. "This way."

The team followed Hansen, as he walked down a ward, briskly. He knew they were all anxious, but there was nothing they could do, she wouldn't be responsive for an hour.

"Right through here, it's more private down here." he told them, "Now, she won't be responsive to any of you. Just keep talking to her, that's all you need to do." The group nodded. "You can go in, I've just been paged, I'll be back soon." he told them rushing off.

She was laid on a bed, her torso completely wrapped up so it was tight. There was tight bandages around her wrists and neck, where objects had pierced the skin. Her face was still un pretty. A black eye, and most of her face was already bruising and swollen.

Jessica was looking at her daughter, being torn apart on the inside. She let out a sob, as Dave wrapped his arm around her small shoulder's, pulling her into his side in a comforting manner.

Morgan was the first in the seat on her left side, and already had a strong hold on her hand, "Baby, you have to stay strong, you promised to keep those lungs working for me once and I'm pretty sure you can do it again. You wondrous goddess, you keep breathin'." he whispered so no one could hear, and pressed a kiss to her hand.

She was one of his best friend's and now here she was, lying in a hospital bed, all banged up thanks to a guy who they couldn't put away because he was dead.

JJ's mind couldn't think properly. She was too busy trying to concentrate with the knowing that Sarah was going to be fine. She was fine. Fine.

Garcia was clinging to Morgan, still sobbing hard. Her make-up completely ruined, the only evidence was now half way down her face.

Reid just stared, watching his friend. He was worried but didn't know to express it, he was confused as well. His mind couldn't help but calculate the excessive amount of bandage wrap on her person.

Hotch stared, as he looked at her. His chest ached seeing her in such a state, knowing he'd done nothing to help her situation what so ever. He wasn't able to concentrate during the case, because his mind wasn't focused.

He'd failed her.


	15. Chapter 15

Once Hotch was left alone, he was at Sarah's side in an instant, his hand in hers, gripping it tightly, "I'm so sorry." he let out, his other hand snaking into her soft hair, "I left you alone, I thought you would've appreciated the space, but instead I almost lost you."

His eyes flew over her features, taking in her brutal appearance. She was awfully pale, a sick pale colour. One of her eyes was black, as bruises crept up and down her body. She was a horrible mess, all because of him. He wasn't there for her. "I'm so sorry, for everything."

Beth suddenly popped into his mind. _What was he thinking?_ Beth wasn't Sarah. He'd missed her. Everything about her, her touch, her smell, her in general. He was an idiot thinking they couldn't make it work, sure they could.

He just didn't believe it at the time.

"Sarah, please open your eyes, for me." he murmured, his lips against her forehead, "You can do it." he squeezed her hand, holding it tightly not wanting to let it go, frightened something would if he did. "I still need you around, you know."

Hansen quickly appeared, moving forward to check her vitals and seeing if she was okay and healthy. He'd appeared, because she was to awaken soon, and he knew what an uproar she could give...

Hotch's hands were forced away, as Sarah became conscious and removed herself from his hold, moving her face away from Hansen eyes as well, pushing him away, feeling anger filling her, "It says DNR, why am I still here?" she let out, quietly.

This is what Hansen had feared, "Sarah-"

She blinked, and pulling herself into a sitting position, ignoring the shooting pain that surged through her stomach and down her legs. "I have a DNR order, and you chose to ignore it."

"Both Dave, your mother and I thought it best to ignore your advanced directives." he explained, seeing Hotch looking horrified.

Hotch stepped back toward the door, not really understanding what was happening right now.

Sarah glanced at him, "You know neither you or any of them are allowed to override it." she pulled out the tube in her nose, falling silent.

"Put that back in. Now!" Hansen argued.

Clyde, hearing the shouting, walked into the room seeing his lovely caramel friend awake and very lively.

"Over my dead body. Dwight, you should've listened to what that paper clearly says, and you signed it!" she raised her voice, becoming agitated very quickly.

Dwight Hansen scowled the woman laying in the bed, "Sarah put the tube back in right now." he glared.

She shook her head, "I don't want it nor do I want your medical attention, Ike." she protested, glaring right back at him. "How many times?"

Dwight winced, "Twice, but we brought you back. What did you want me to do? Let you die?! Is that what you wanted?" he exclaimed, "How'd you think your parents would feel if you died? What about your family outside in that waiting room?" he quizzed.

"DNR."

Ike rolled his eyes, "Get over it, you're alive and you're going to stay like that for a long time, kid." Ike stated to her. "You've always been like this." he commented, putting her chart down angrily.

Sarah rolled her eyes and coughed in pain. "Well, I'm sorry!"

Clyde frowned at the man, as he watched, "Ike, that's not the most intelligent thing you could have come up with." he let out, sighing.

* * *

The team watched, as their friend laid in her bed, motionlessly.

She was refusing medical attention and refusing food.

"We have to do something," Morgan said, panicked.

"No, we can't. She's angry enough with us all as it is." Dave sighed, feeling shameful and terribly guilty. It was his fault, he agreed to resuscitate her, exactly what she didn't want.

"We need to get her to change her mind. I don't want her wasting away in there! She's our friend, and all you're all doing is standing there!" Morgan let out, furious that nothing was happening.

"She said she wanted to die."

Everyone turned to Hotch, stunned.

Garcia's throat thickened, as she struggled to swallow. "What?" she squeaked.

Hotch sighed, "She doesn't want to be here anymore. She said "Why am I still here?" I'm pretty sure, she isn't happy about our decision on her life." he explained, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Oh, why would she choose something like that? To not live?"

"Maybe, she's tired of it all. I wouldn't blame her if she was, I mean she lives an extremely high profiled life. There's always something lurking around the corner, it's just a matter of time before-"

"Reid!" Hotch scolded him, harshly.

"We have to do at least something." Emily suggested, frowning.

"She won't listen to any of us." JJ replied, rolling her eyes.

They all turned back, seeing her ripping out yet another feeding tube.

Hotch was taken off of balance when Reid turned to him, "Hotch, you should talk to her." he suggested, patting his shoulder.

He swung around, "No... more to the point, why me?" he pressed, wanting to know what was so special about it that Reid had suggested it.

"Reid's right." Dave nodded, "Just try and talk some sense into her, this isn't what she wants."

Hotch glanced back at the team, as they nodded for him to carry on and he tentatively walked into the room, "Sarah... ?"

She sighed, "What do you want?" and threw her head back in frustration.

Hotch gritted his teeth, "I'm- we're all worried about you." he was mixing up his words now.

She nodded, "That's good but no need, I've got it covered."

And then he lost it, "None of us signed up for this! We went into that building to save your life! And this is how you repay us?!"

"I never asked you to." she countered, "That was your choice, not mine!"

Hotch rolled his eyes, "Why'd you have to be so damn stubborn? We're talking about your life here, how can you not care about that?"

She finally looked at him, "I stopped caring the moment I was raped, the moment I was violated, the moment my brother was murdered." she hissed, angrier than before now, it was surging through he body. "You have no idea what that feels like."

"Sarah... "

"No! You ignored the DNR, that's what you signed up for. This is just my retaliation, it's my future choices you need to be aware of." she met his eyes. "Now, get out... I don't want to talk to you anymore."

"Sarah, you don't really want this... this is just an easier way out." Hotch said, "You're being a coward."

She smiled, "A coward, huh? All I see in front of me is coward, and that coward's you." she spat. "You're the reason I'm being like this- how is Beth by the way?" she tilted her head in annoyance.

Hotch winced, that hurt.

"I bet if you were down there, you wouldn't like to be alive, knowing that everything that happened down there will not leave your head and instead it replays over and over, non-stop?" she questioned. "It's hell, and personally I'm sick and tired of being saved by people, I couldn't care less anymore. That's why I have a DNR order, because I'm sick of everything."

She turned to face Hotch, who was staring at her, "What? You want me to say thank you?! I saved all of your asses, getting taken. I somehow managed to stop him from targeting you and the team. Me! I did that! By giving him what he wanted! Me!" she exclaimed, her blood pressure rising, her heart rate increasing.

"Thank you." he murmured, feeling guilty.

Sarah sighed, "You're welcome."

And then the monitors began to beep.

Hotch froze, panicked, as Morgan and Clyde raced into the room, "Sweet Pea!" Morgan shouted.

"My chest." she coughed, as blood appeared near her mouth.

"Doctor!" Morgan exclaimed, in a wild frenzy. He turned back to see her face laced with pain.

Dwight ran in, with the team following closely, "Oh, shit." he cursed, knowing what was happening. "Okay, prep an OR! We need it now, the Scar Tissue has ruptured, and caused internal bleeding." he shouted to several attendings. "You two, scrub in. We need all the hands we can get!"

"Sarah you need to breath steadily, your blood pressure is much too high, calm down."

Morgan followed them out, staring as they wheeled the woman out. His eyes were wide with panic as he came face to face with the team. "What happened?" Dave asked, worried.

"Scar Tissue, ruptured?" he let out, still a little shocked.

JJ gasped, "Oh, my god."

"She was talking to me earlier, she was fine." Morgan protested.

Hotch sighed, "We'll hopefully, she'll be alright."

Morgan glared at him, "Hopefully? There's no question about it!" he spat, "You caused it!"

Hotch frowned, "What?"

"You were shoutin' at her for no reason, Hotch. You caused her blood pressure to increase!" Morgan exclaimed, angrily. "It was all you!"

_It was all your fault!_

* * *

_Forty five minutes later..._

Sarah was returned to her room, looking paler than before. She was very weak and felt... hopeless. She hated that feeling, so much. She hated having to be dependent on people all the time.

But she did get one thing she'd wanted for a while; peace.

The team had decided to back off for a while, and Dave had managed to convinced her mother to go home and get some rest.

The same went for Spencer, Emily, JJ and Garcia. Hotch had ordered them to drive Jessica back to one of their's where they could all rest, while he, Morgan and Clyde stayed at the hospital.

Morgan walked along, seeing Clyde Easter hand-in-hand with a small boy, who was clinging to his side. "Easter?" he questioned, attracting the attention of the other's.

"Mr Easter, where's Saz?" the small boy questioned, tugging on Clyde's trouser leg.

Clyde grinned at the boy, "She's in there, Sebastian." he pointed the room out to the small boy. "But, Doctor Ike is in there at the moment, Seb." he stated, crouching to his height.

"Is she alright?" Sebastian questioned, tilting his head.

Clyde chuckled, ruffling his hair, "Yes, she's fine." he nodded, "She was hurt, that's all."

Sebastian narrowed his eyes at Clyde, "But she's okay now?" he quizzed.

Clyde nodded again, "Yes."

Sebastian looked around the corner, seeing the doctor talking to his aunt, and then he ran for it. Sebastian ran toward the bed, launching himself onto it, "Saz!" he exclaimed, flinging himself around Sarah's neck.

"Hey, Seb." she greeted, hugging her nephew/godson back tightly, pressing a kiss to his hair.

Sebastian pulled back frowning, "Mr Easter said you were 'urt. Are you okay, now?" he pressed, sitting forward on his knees.

"Yeah, Doctor Ike fixed me- so I'm all better." she smiled, watching him.

"Clyde, said I hav' to live with you, is that true, Saz?" Sebastian asked, sounding confused.

Sarah nodded, "That's right, Seb." she agreed, nodding her head.

"Why?" he paused, "Why can't I live with mom and dad anymore?"

Sarah swallowed hard, "B- because of the bad guy." she answered, looking away.

"Bad guy?" Sebastian repeated. "Like the one's you fight with your superhero team?" he asked, excited.

She smiled sadly, "Yeah, the bad guy's I catch."

Sebastian frowned then, "But you're goin' to rescue them right?" he quizzed, not fully understanding.

"Yeah, Seb." she agreed, knowing it wasn't the right time to tell the kid the full story of what had happened to his parents in the past week. Sarah shook her head, "Me and my superheroes will rescue them." she promised him.

Sebastian frowned again, "But you always get the bad guy's." he stated.

"I know." she paused, "But this one was too much for me, Seb. I tried, but I failed... but I'm not gonna let you down." she met his eyes and smiled. "I won't, I promise."

"That's 'kay." he smiled, placing a hand on her shoulder, "There's more bad guy's for you to catch, right?"

Sarah nodded, "Right." she agreed. Ike stepped back inside the room, nodding to Sarah, as she nodded back at him. "Sebastian, you need to go back into the waiting room, now."

"No." he shook his head, hugging her tighter, "I don't want to go." he said, stubbornly, crossing his arm over his chest before surging forward to hug her neck.

"Sebastian, it'll only be for a second." she promised, as he still didn't let go of her neck.

"No!" he shouted.

Sarah slowly climbed out of bed, despite all the wires attached to her, she pulled them out which made the monitors scream out in a panic. She held Sebastian in her arms as she stepped outside of the room, walking toward the waiting room.

"Sarah, you need to get back into bed, you've just had surgery." Ike called but she ignored him.

The four men watched, as Sarah knelt down and put Sebastian into a chair, looking at him. "Sebastian, look at me." she spoke, as his eyes met hers.

Sebastian was crying.

She wiped his tears away, "I'll be fine, but you gotta stay here with Mr Easter." she said, looking back at Clyde, "He'll look after you, and when I'm fine... I'll make sure that Doctor Ike will come and find you." she promised him. "How's that sound?"

Sebastian nodded, "Okay." he agreed, raising his fist.

"Good." she touched her fist against his own.


	16. Chapter 16

Strauss stared at the agent who sat opposite her, fiddling with her hands showing how hard it was for her sit still during their interview. "Agent Ward, can you please tell me the full events which happened while Stuart Cullen abducted you."

Sarah shuddered at the request, but answered anyway. "In which order would you prefer them to be told to you, Ma'am?" she countered, her eyes dull and lifeless, rising to meet the older woman's.

Strauss shrugged, "Any... preferably in the order relevant." she advised.

Sarah sighed, "You know that the first place he sought out was the BAU, in which he threatened to kill Agent Anderson, if he didn't get what he wanted which was myself. I willingly gave myself over in order to spare Anderson."

Strauss nodded, "Continue."

"It wasn't long before the torture began, he screwed a collar to my neck, which was covered in spikes. And then..." she trailed off, remembering the events.

_"20:14. Then death and Hades were thrown into the lake of fire. The lake of fire is the second death." she paused, "20:15. If anyone's name was not found written in the book of life, he was thrown into the lake of fire."_

_And he fired his MP5KS, and the bullets connected with Zeke's chest. "No! NO!" she struggled in her binds, trying to break free. Blood caked her face, as she stared forward. "You son of a bitch!" she kept struggling._

_Zeke's body fell to the floor, and then he let his finger press on the trigger, and he carried on shooting the body. "Stop it! STOP IT!" she demanded, panicking. Zeke was already dead, but he was doing it to get her to crack._

The gunshots rung through her head, as she winced at the memories.

Strauss frowned, "And then?" she continued, wanting Sarah to carry on.

Sarah swallowed hard, "And then he killed Zeke, but firing his Sub-machine gun more than sixty times in the space of two minutes into his entire torso and head." she explained.

Strauss nodded again, "What next? What did Cullen do next?" she pressed, tilting her head.

Her advisers narrowed their eyes at her, noticing how pressing and insensitive she was being about the whole subject toward the agent.

"He then began to..."

_Blood cascaded down her body, staining her once clean skin. It glistened in the dim lit room, exposed the flesh that hid beneath the already deep cuts._

_Stuart sighed, picking a space on her body, "Derek Morgan. Now you two share a past. I mean Karl Buford and Dennis Archer were the same people when you think about it. Although Archer had fantastic taste." he whispered. "Look, he chose you. Little Miss Sunshine." he taunted, chuckling darkly._

_Sarah lurched forward, moving her legs so she hit him in the groin area, glaring harshly._

_Stuart chuckled, standing up straight, "You really shouldn't have done that." he sighed, forcing the scalpel down the center of her abdomen, and ripped it back out again. "And our last member Aaron Hotchner? Who's he to you?"_

_Sarah facial features fell, as Stuart smiled, "Oh, that's soft subject." he reached for a bucket, "Well, he's a soft subject in general." she stared at him, not wanting him to carry on with Hotch at all, "And of course you love his son, Jack."_

_That tore a snag as she kicked him in the abdomen._

_"Sweetheart, lets cleanse that wound of yours." and then he poured the bucket over her body._

_Sarah's eyes nearly flung themselves out of their sockets, as her body throbbed in sheer pain. Her cuts were stinging madly, bringing tears to her eyes, as she winced constantly. Her head was spinning, her heart going ten to the dozen, struggling to keep going as the pain was inflicted upon her person._

_He stared, before pressing a finger to her wound which sat on her stomach, "I know they're so desperate to find you. They're looking for you, but that doesn't mean they'll find you. They may know my name, but they don't know... not like you do."_

She took a deep breath, "He then began to torture me, taunting me about the team, using Sulfuric acid... to get what he wanted, and to get to me."

Strauss began writing on the pad in front of her, as Sarah eyed.

"Then came the beatings, which didn't stop... not once." she sighed, "Cullen, then used my own memories of my deceased partner and son to torture my mind, which he succeed by playing the home videos we had creating while my son was still alive and leading up to his passing."

Strauss's face quickly became stricken and pale.

"And that's when he killed my brother," she let out quietly, "I couldn't stop him... I was useless." she paused, the images flashing through her mind.

_"Jon, I don't think I can handle another kid... not that I don't love Seb to bits... " she bit out, holding back the tears._

_Jon smiled, "I know he's different, he's very opinionated and stubborn." he paused again, "J-just give him a good life- a happy one."_

_Sarah opened her mouth but words refused to come out, and so she closed it again._

_And then the blade slowly swept along the skin, causing blood to fly, splatter and spray everywhere._

She looked up, bringing herself out of her thoughts. "I let my brother die, leaving his son without a father and a mother. That's when he took me upstairs and raped me in my own bed which I slept in while growing up as a child, in my father's house."

"And after that, your team ambushed Stuart while he was at Ace Hardware, which soon led to your rescue." Strauss added.

"Rescue?" she scoffed, laughing. "You call that a rescue?"

"That's how Agent Garcia described it."

"They didn't rescue me, Ma'am. It was all Clyde Easter." Sarah told her. "He was the map that led them straight to me... I knew what needed to happen, I just needed to have the right people there."

"What do you remember after that?" Strauss questioned.

Sarah closed her eyes, "I remember holding my brother's dead body in my arms, his blood caking my hands and torso." she paused.

_She pulled the chain around his neck, tightening it._

_His hands took a hold of her wrists, desperately trying to pry her hands away, but they had a strong hold._

"And after that, I killed Stuart Cullen by strangling him with the chain he retrained me with, I killed a man out of cold blood and I don't regret it." she met Strauss's gaze, "Not one bit..."

* * *

Sebastian's hands moved across the paper quickly, as he drew with the pencil in his hand. His eyes looked up, as he spotted Sarah walking through the glass doors, still looking beaten up.

He jumped out of his chair, and maneuvered himself around JJ and Garcia to run out of the room and down the catwalk. He quickly sped up, and flung himself into Sarah's arms, as she picked him easily.

She set him back down, and slowly lowered herself onto her knees, so she was around his height.

Words started to flow from her mouth, as she explained to the child what was going on about his parents.

Upon hearing the news, Sebastian took a step back and shook his head before letting the tears stream down his face. "I wish it was you who was dead!"

She moved forward, attempting to catch his arm, "Seb-"

"No!" he exclaimed, "Leave me alone! You should've died, not them!"

JJ's mouth dropped, as she glanced at the team, shocked by the boy's harsh words. "I can't believe he just said that."

"He's upset... he has every right to." Dave stated, sighing.

Morgan shook his head, "Poor kid."

Sarah stood up and watched the boy run off down the corridor, by passing people as he did. "I'm sorry." she murmured, looking to her side, seeing Erin Strauss. "Ma'am." she greeted.

Strauss nodded, "Agent Ward, I think the best decision for you, and the one I have come to and agreed on with my advisers... is for you to retire from the BAU." Strauss spoke, "And concentrate on that confused, broken little boy."

Sarah watched her, searching her face. "You support that very strongly, then." she let out.

"What do you mean, Agent?" Strauss frowned.

"When anything ever happens to one the agents in this Unit, you always offer retirement, and I bet benefits is lurking just around the corner. You did the exact same with Agent Hotchner, when his wife was murdered." she paused, "I don't particularly want to leave the BAU... it's all I got- apart from a kid that hates me."

"Sarah, you could always concentrate on your music career, we both know how fond you are of that, don't we?" Strauss suggested, clasping her hands together at the thought. "Or filmography even?"

Sarah nodded, "May I have time to think about an answer?" she requested, furrowing her eyebrows.

"Well, I was hoping I was going to leave with one." Strauss paused, "But, if you wish, then yes you may." and then she charged off again.

Her phone buzzed, as she pulled out and saw a message from her dad. '_On my way, be there in around ten minutes. xx' _she rolled her eyes, and slipped it back into her pocket just as hand met her shoulder.

"You alright, kiddo?"

Sarah turned seeing Dave standing there, and the rest of the team stood in the conference room, watching. She shook her head before answering, "No."

Dave took her arm, and led her toward a desk, when he made her sit down, "Can I ask you a question?" he stared at her, leaning against the desk.

"Sure." Sarah agreed, nodding.

Dave forced a smile, "How can you choose to not feel?" he let out, knowing it probably wasn't the right time to ask it, but it had been on his mind for a long time.

Sarah smiled at him, "I don't know..." she trailed off, "But, right now... I'm failing." she admitted.

"Then why do it, if it's going to make it so much harder for you to control?

Her eyed fell to the floor, as she thought of an answer for his question, "I always thought it made it easier, and for a time- it did." she looked up at him, "Dave, I have an all consuming darkness inside of me. I'm a bad person." she paused, "I am- I am dangerous." she let out a shaky breath, "I'm the anti-hero in the story."

"I want you to listen to me very carefully, kiddo. You're not a bad person. You're a very good person, who bad things have happened to." he paused, "You call yourself dangerous, because you know what you're capable of doing to someone... because the SIS trained you to kill, and you can."

"And because most people I know seem to have a tendency to die around me."

Dave nodded, "And that." he agreed, "But you're not dangerous, neither evil, kid. Remember that." he got up from the desk, and walked back to the conference room.

Hotch met him, and pulled him aside, "What's going on with Sebastian?" he pressed.

"I don't know." Dave shrugged.

"Well, didn't you ask?"

"No, I didn't." Dave shook his head, "And if you're so worried for the kid, why don't you?" Dave countered, frowning deeply.

"She shouldn't have told him like that." Hotch sighed.

Dave scoffed, "She's not like you, Aaron." he paused, "You don't know her at all. She was a gestational surrogate for Jon's wife, simply because Gretchen was unable to conceive... in all truth Sebastian is like her child. What'd you have to say about that?"

Hotch fell quiet, as he let Dave go, his eyes falling onto Sarah who was still sat at the desk.

"Princess!"

He watched, as she looked around and slowly stood up. "Dad." she called, as Oliver Ward flew through the glass doors, bearing a small smile. He pulled his daughter into his arms, hugging her tightly. She slowly returned it, but soon pulled back.

"I missed you." he uttered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Lieutenant General!" Oliver called out.

Sarah frowned at him, and looked behind to see another man follow his movements through the doors. The man was wearing a pair of aviator sunglasses and carrying an US Army bag on his shoulder, while wearing a worn bomber jacket.

"Son of a bitch." Sarah murmured.

The man pulled of his sunglasses and smiled a small sad smile, "Hey, Sare Bear." the man greeted her, pulling Sarah into his strong arms, dropping his bag to the floor.

"You're meant to be in Pakistan." she bit out, quietly.

"Sorry."

Dave ran down the catwalk again, "Chris!" he shouted in utter glee.

Christopher Ward's head shot up, easily recognizing the voice which had just reached his ears. "Dave Rossi." he grinned, letting go of his sister to hug the older man. "You haven't aged at all." he chuckled, ruffling his dark hair.

"Whatever, kid." Dave said, pulling back.

Chris's eyes found his sister's as she stared at him, looking confused at why he was even there. "Okay, maybe I should explain." he spoke up.

Sarah nodded, "Yeah, that'd be a good place to start."

He sighed, "I got honorably discharged." he said, "That's all, I served for as long as I could, with a comfortable rank as Lieutenant General. And, then I fancied coming home to my family, knowing that they needed me now more than ever."

Sarah nodded, and turned to her father, "Go talk to Sebastian, please." she pleaded.

"Why?" Oliver frowned in confusion.

Sarah looked away, "He won't talk to me... he's angry." she paused, "He ran off in that direction, please dad."

Oliver looked reluctant, but eventually he nodded in agreement and ventured down the corridor, off to find his grandson.

"Chris! You have to come and meet the family." Dave said, wrapping his arm around Chris's stocky shoulder and dragging him up the catwalk.

Chris stopped abruptly, "Actually Dave, I really need to talk with my sister." he told his uncle figure, frowning. "Sorry." he excused himself, and walked back toward Sarah and took her arm in his hand.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: So, this chapter will involve Jon's funeral, in which Sarah and her family will be saying a goodbye to him, along with close friends and family. I hope you all enjoy this chapter.**

**This will also be a songfic too! Song: _To Build A Home_ by The Cinematic Orchestra.**

**Please, review, follow and favourite!**

* * *

_'It's sad when someone you know, becomes someone you knew.' - Henry Collins._

* * *

_There is a house built out of stone,_  
_Wooden floors, walls and window sills..._

The crowd slowly gathered themselves, taking seats in the rows set out for them. First came family and close friends; including the Ward family and the BAU, courtesy of Sarah.

The team were already sat an waiting, as they watched Sarah greet everyone by the hand.

Sebastian ran over, showing Sarah that his tie still wasn't done. She crouched down to his height and began to tie it with her two hands. "You remember the way to remember?" she questioned.

Sebastian nodded.

"Gathering his senses about him, the rabbit bounded away with the fox snapping at his cotton tail." her hands quickly stared on his tie, "Once around the tree, the fox chased the rabbit. Twice around the tree the little rabbit fled with the quick gray fox close behind. Trying to shake the persistent fox, the rabbit scooted under a bush." she pushed the blade under the neck loop easily, "The fox, being too large, lost time struggling under the bush."

Sarah then pulled the blade through the neck loop, "With a giant leap, the little rabbit cleared the top of a big round log… And dove right into the safety of his cool, dark hole. The quick gray fox wasn't quite quick enough. He wouldn't be dining on rabbit that evening." she pushed the blade through the knot loop, and held the tail and pulled the blade to tighten the knot.

"Is daddy gonna be an angel now?" she looked at Sebastian and nodded.

"Yeah, Seb." she agreed.

Slowly, she made her way up to the podium, which had been set up. "We are gathered here today in the memory of my brother, Jon, so that together we may acknowledge and share both our joy in the gift that his life was to us, and the pain that his passing brings. In sharing the joy and the pain together today, may we lessen the pain and remember more clearly the joy."

Sarah licked her lips before continuing. "Jon was just thirty one years old when he passed away on Friday November tenth. He was born on July twenty sixth, 1981 in London to my Mom, Jessica and my Dad, Oliver." she clapped eyes on Dave, who nodded for her to continue.

"Jon was very close to his family, to his friends, and also to his beloved son, Sebastian." she nodded at her nephew. "Growing up with Jon as an younger brother wasn't always easy for me. Even though I was older, he'd pick on me constantly, but let anyone else even look at me funny, and Jon would be on our side, whatever may come... I think I got him out of at least ten? If not more fights, when he was fifteen."

_Tables and chairs worn by all of the dust,_  
_This is a place where I don't feel alone,_  
_This is a place where I feel at home._

Sarah let out a shaky breath, "You gonna have to forgive me though, usually when it comes to words they flow... but when it's in this context, it's utterly different... Jon, as you know was extremely fond of his job as an animator and I often employed him to create videos for me in my music. To say he enjoyed it would be a terrible understatement." she paused, sucking in another breath.

"He loved to have a game of soccer, just so he could rub it in the opponents face when he won, which was always. He loved American football... the normal things that an adult man would I suppose. Apart from the old game of Truth or Dare, here and there. There are a lot of stories about us that we laughed about for hours, but I'm afraid that those stories will have to between you and me bro."

"There were other things besides drawing and watching The Saints, he loved playing cards and going to the casino. He especially liked to play poker... he'd always get a good hand, and well work with what he got." Sarah paused again, "I'll tell you what, you never wanted to get into a long game with that bastard." the crowd laughed at her words. "Cheat ya out of your own home if he could."

_And I built a home,_  
_for you,_  
_for me._

_Until it disappeared,_  
_from me,_  
_from you._

"Jon was a man who didn't have a mean bone in his body, a warm friendly man who made his mark in the world not with grand gestures or fancy titles, but by the basic goodness and generosity of his character, and how he brought out these qualities in others." she sighed, "I was reading the other day... yes I read." she said, as a few laughs came. "And I saw this poem- who quoted it is completely unknown but I thought it was relevant."

_**I have seen death too often to believe in death,**_  
_**It is not an ending, but a withdrawal.**_  
_**As one who finishes a long journey.**_  
_**Stills the motor. Turns off the lights**_  
_**Steps from the car**_  
_**And walks up the path**_  
_**To the home that awaits him. **_

_**Unknown**_

_And now, it's time to leave and turn to dust..._

She took in another breath, "There were many great and wonderful aspects to Jon's life, and many ways that he touched our lives. He will be remembered as a exceptional father, wonderful brother, a great friend, a generous uncle, cousin, a poker player, a friendly face in town. In all these ways and more, he made our lives richer and fuller. Now that he has passed away, of course there is emptiness and pain, confusion and maybe even anger at death coming to a man of only 31, but if you do have an anger inside you... then you may blame me, as we all know that it's my fault that I couldn't protect him from the things that go bump in the night, like an older sibling should... and I failed at that job." she paused, seeing everyone giving her looks.

_Out in the garden where we planted the seeds,_  
_There is a tree as old as me._  
_Branches were sewn by the color of green,_  
_Ground had arose and passed its knees._

"But, he lives on in our memories and stories, and in what all of us have become because of him. So I encourage you to share –today, tomorrow and in the years to come- your memories and stories, and to share the pain of your loss as well. In this way we will keep the gift of Jon's life alive."

Sarah looked up, "On behalf of the rest of the family, I'd like to thank you all for coming here today."

_By the cracks of the skin I climbed to the top,_  
_I climbed the tree to see the world._  
_When the gusts came around to blow me down,_  
_Held on as tightly as you held onto me._  
_Held on as tightly as you held onto me..._

She climbed down quickly off the podium, as everyone rose to their feet and began to move forward to speak to her and the family.

The team sighed as they all slowly moved forward to comfort their friend.

Morgan was first though, "Sweet Pea." he pulled her to him, rubbing a hand on her back.

"Derek." she murmured into his shoulder, hugging him back tightly.

_And I built a home,_  
_for you._  
_for me._

"You're gonna be alright, Sweetness." he said, pulling away.

The rest of the team then followed Morgan, by hugging her tightly but when it got to Hotch, her eyes slowly trailed away to a figure standing in the distance. "You'll have to excuse me, we've an unwanted visitor." she quickly walked toward the man standing afar.

_Until it disappeared,_  
_from me._  
_from you._

_And now, it's time to leave and turn to dust..._

The team followed her form as she stalked toward him, soon coming to a stop.

"Why are you here, Anton?" Sarah was the first to speak, raising an eyebrow at the man in front of her.

Anton Khodkevich, a mid-forties male who stood around 6', tall built and thick set, stared Sarah down before slowly smirking. "You're contract has expired, my love." Anton let out, moving forward to grab her arm.

She immediately tensed, but Anton was stronger and quickly rolled up her sleeve to show a mark of an 'A'. "The ATREYU are now after you... as you have no contract to protect you from your SIS days, little lady." he traced the burn on her arm. "We're coming for you."

Sarah shuddered on the inside, her mind being wiped blank, "I've just buried my brother, you think you could lay off a week or two?" she quizzed, eyeing Khodkevich darkly.

He smirked at her again, "That's not very likely, love." he chuckled, shifting on his feet quickly.

She ripped her arm from his grasp, "If you come near me or my family, I will end you." she stared him, "I will kill you." and then she began to walk back over to the group.

"You threats don't scare me, little lady!" Khodevich called, laughing.

"Goodbye, Mr Khodevich." Sarah spoke, still walking away from him. "Tonight, you will die."

When she returned to where everyone else was, Dave was already eyeing her as Hotch moved forward to give her a hug. His arms wound their way around her waist, as she returned the hug, resting her face into his neck which sent a tingling feeling down Hotch's spine. "We need to talk." he murmured quietly, pulling back.

* * *

_'Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.' - Dr Suess._


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: So, um so I haven't updated in three days, but it's Easter and it's been kinda busy.**

**So, basically Sarah and Hotch talk about the guy who showed up at the funeral, and he gives her some advice, but she doesn't take it. And I sort turn her into something else... sorry?**

**She then does something terrible and needs Hotch to help her.**

* * *

Hotch looked at he spotted Sarah sitting in a chair by herself, staring out onto the landscape of her father's garden. She looked so lifeless and emotionless... he didn't like it, she was a different person to how she was before. "Sarah." he spoke, catching her attention as he sat beside her.

"Aaron." she acknowledged, nodding.

Hotch watched her, "Anton Khodevich." he stated, as she looked at him fully now.

"What about him?" she dismissed, absentmindedly.

Hotch sighed as he sat forward in his chair, "I think he threatened you earlier- he and you have a past and obviously something has happened... because I know full well that since the incident between us, there's no way you would've hugged me like that if something wasn't up." he paused. "I'm also guessing that this is to do with ATREYU; Anton, Tolenka, Rurik, Egor, Yurik and Urie Khodevich. Six brothers, all grew up to be assassins."

"So, you're familiar with them and their organization, then." Sarah raised an eyebrow, "What are you getting at?" she asked, throwing him a look of suspicion.

"Don't do anything stupid." he warned.

"Like what?" she questioned, closing her eyes, before opening them again to look at him.

"Don't do what you're thinking about doing, it won't make things any better."

Sarah sighed, "Aaron, they employed Stuart Cullen- remember him?" she quizzed. "He's the guy who helped kill Craig, he murdered one of my oldest friends and my brother. ATREYU, deserve to die... they're asking for it." she paused. "I'm going to end them Aaron, before they end me."

Hotch narrowed his eyes at her, "What do you mean?" he pressed, confused.

She rolled up her sleeve, showing him the scar of an 'A' which had been burned onto her skin. "This was branded on me when I was working for the SIS, they'd ordered me to kill ATREYU then, which I failed and Anton branded me with this."

Hotch slowly took a hold of her arm, and ran his hands over the burn, "I've never noticed this before, even when we... why would he do that?" he looked up, frowning. "What is it?

"It's a contract."

"A contract?" Hotch repeated, not quite understanding.

"Keeping me alive." Sarah added.

Hotch nodded, "Right and why was Anton there today?" he questioned, needing to know to what was going on.

"Well..." she swallowed, "It just ran out."

* * *

Rain drenched her prone form, as she dropped to her knees and pulled out her cell, dialing a number. "Sarah?" his voice met her ears, as she sighed. "What's wrong?"

"I need you to come to the Khodevich's Klub. Now."

Hotch frowned as he glanced at Beth, who was sat on his couch, "Why?" he questioned, worried by her call.

"I did something real bad." she answered him. "Real bad." she repeated, barely audible.

Hotch sighed, "All right, I'm on my way. Don't move." he hung up, as she nodded.

"Don't move." she repeated, dropping the Machete. She looked at her cell again and dialed another number. "911, what's your emergency?" a masculine voice questioned.

She sucked in a breath, "There's been a sextuple homicide at Khodevich's Klub on Oak Lane." Sarah stated, hanging up and putting her phone down.

She wiped her face with her hands, clearing some blood, but applying more at the same time. Her hands were already stained as was most of her body. She was brought out of her thoughts, as she heard footsteps running toward her, "Sarah!"

It was Hotch.

His pace slowed, as he saw his agent covered in blood, a machete lying in front of her on the floor. He went in front of her, and became horrified. She was _literally_ covered in blood. He crouched down to get a better look at her, "What did you do?" he asked quietly.

"The police are on their way."

He shook his head, still lost. "What do you mean?" he questioned, "What did you do?"

She sighed, "What did I just do?" she shouted. "What did I just do?" she kept repeated over and over.

Hotch eyed the machete, and looked back at her. "Sarah... tell me what happened." he spoke.

She looked up at him, "I just became a serial killer, that's what happened." she stated.

And then he realized. He stood up and looked over at the Khodevich's Klan and then back at her. "You killed them?" he spat at her.

"What?" she asked. "They were gonna to kill me once the night was up... I had to think about Sebastian." she paused, "And then my parents, and Chris, Arlo and Joel. And then you and the team... "

Hotch began to panic, and pulled her into his arms, also picking up the machete as he ran them both to his car. "Let's get out of here." Hotch said, as he forced her into the front seat of his car, throwing the machete into the boot, as he rounded the corner to climb into the driver's side.

* * *

Once at his apartment, Hotch managed to get Sarah to his door without anyone spotting her in the state she was. "We need to get you cleaned up." he stated, closing the door. "Go take a shower."

Sarah shook her head, "No, I don't want to take a shower." she spoke, shaking her head still.

Hotch gritted his teeth, and dropped her jacket to the floor, and moved to get her up. "You're taking a shower." he ordered, forcing her into the bathroom.

Sarah pulled out of his grasp, "I don't want to." she resisted, shaking her head again at his request.

Hotch glared and reached for her top, quickly pulling it over her head. He stared at her, throwing the top to the floor, "You're going to have a shower, and then we'll talk." he quickly removed himself from the bathroom, leaving her standing there.

Upon hearing his words, she nodded to herself and quickly stripped down and out of her clothes. She turned the shower on, and stepped inside. She then let her mind run wild, she'd just killed six men which makes a total of seven in the last two weeks.

She was serial killer.

A serial killer.

Hotch soon returned with a towel in his hand, as he stepped inside he caught the outline of her body behind the steam-ridden glass. He had to stop himself from looking anymore, he planted the towel on top of the toilet seat and exited the room.

It didn't long for Sarah to finish showering, and reach for the towel sat on the toilet seat. She quickly wrapped it around her body and hauled open the bathroom door, walking out to see Hotch replacing his shirt, which was red as well and then into the washing machine.

He turned to see her standing there, watching him. His hands immediately moved toward his scarred chest to shield them from her eyes.

"How many times I have seen them and you still hide them?" she asked as Hotch walked past her, ignoring her words.

He ignored her question, "I'll go find you some clothes." he strode into the bedroom, quickly finding one of his old Harvard shirts and then a pair of _her _jogging bottoms in a pile of clothing inside his drawers.

"After I get dressed..." Sarah followed him into the room, "I'm gonna leave." she let him know, as he turned to stare at her.

Hotch scoffed, "No, you're not. We've got to talk about what you did." he explained.

She sighed, "Stop treating me like I'm a child." she let out.

"You don't get it do you?" Hotch turned on her, "You murdered six people tonight... I should have handed you into the authorities." Hotch hissed, glaring at her harshly.

"Then why didn't you?" she countered.

Hotch fell silent, he couldn't think of a suitable answer to provide her with... he didn't know why he didn't do it. He didn't. He quickly left his bedroom so she could could get dressed.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: So, I thought I'd upsate considering no school due to a power cut... I only have to say one thing for this installment. **

**I really dislike writing smut... like A LOT.**

**Old habits die hard.**

* * *

Hotch stared at Sarah, eyeing her as she sat next to him on his couch. "Let me get this straight." he paused, closing his eyes. "You murdered all six Khodevich brothers, so they wouldn't kill you." Hotch repeated.

_Earlier..._

_Blood caked her clothes, drenching her face completely... painting it a deep crimson red shade which made her look even more murderous. She knew she shouldn't be doing this, that she should stop... but that was the problem, she couldn't._

_Urie fell to the floor, as Sarah took off his arm allowing blood to spurt into the air_

_Tolenka tripped over a chair, hitting his head as he went down. She quickly caught up with him and sliced his arm off too, which made him pass out from the pain of the loss of his limb._

_Egor and Rurik both went down together, choking on their own blood and the blade hit their torsos, shredding the flesh._

_She turned and stalked to where Anton was, leaning against the bar, struggling to hold on. She grabbed his collar and forced him to the floor, pointing the blade at him._

_Anton raised his hands in surrender, "Sarah, please." he pleaded. "I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!"_

_"It's too late for sorry." and then the machete swung at his neck. "When I make my promises, I keep them."_

_Seconds later, another shower blood flew into the air, covering her completely so she looked like a drowned rat. It was like a frenzy, blood was dancing around the room, slowly flooding the large surface area._

_Six men._

_All dead._

_She'd obliterated the Khodevich sextuplets._

_And another thing... she was now a Serial Killer._

_Serial Killer._

_Murderer._

Sarah sighed, looking up at him. "You don't understand, Aaron." she sucked in a breath, "They kill you, then your associates as well- family, friends... everyone. They make it look like you never existed... what's that make me? A famous singer- songwriter, actress- serial killer catcher and murderer? All in one?" she looked down, reaching for her phone and checked the time. "I should go." she stood up, Hotch's Harvard top slowly rose up to reveal the most recent and prominent scars.

And then without even thinking Hotch opened his mouth and spoke, "Do they still hurt?"

She turned to look at him and shook her head, "Not as much- different days, different feelings. Now and then." she pulled the top down further, not wanting him to see.

"You don't have to hide them."

Sarah smiled, "Says you?" she countered, rolling her eyes.

Hotch rose to his feet, "Okay." he agreed, and then he removed his own shirt, throwing it to the floor.

"What are you doing?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

Hotch sighed, "Not hiding." he moved to reach for the top she was wearing, but she caught his hands before he could.

"Don't." she held his hands, "I don't like to be reminded that they're there."

Hotch ignored her words, and moved his hands under top allowing them to float across her stomach, feeling her flinch and her body tense as he did. He slowly moved them upwards so he could pull his shirt over her head and let it drop to the floor.

Sarah tried to pry his hands off of her waist, but he had a firm grip on her body. "Aaron, let go." she whispered, trying to stepped away from him but failing easily.

Their eyes met and they stared at each other for a couple of seconds longer, when Hotch suddenly felt her hands move toward his torso, where they met the first of the many scars.

Hotch closed his eyes, savouring the moment before it was too late. He felt her hands move across his chest and stopping near his sternum. "She won't repulse you, when you show her." he heard her whisper, before he felt her lips against his skin.

Hotch gritted his teeth, "She's not you." he let out, before leaning forward to kiss her.

Sarah turned her head away, "No- it's not fair to me- or to Beth." she let out, "You can't keep- " she was cut off by his lips smashing onto her own.

Hotch smiled softly, "Old habits die hard." he murmured, deepening the kiss, and quickly moving them toward his bedroom.

Hotch kicked the door open, seeing a large bed sat in the center of the room. Hotch was soon kissing her again, and then he pushed her against the bed, forcing her onto her back while his nimble fingers worked at her pants.

Once they were unzipped he slid them off her legs and threw the pants to floor, dis-guarded.

Sarah sighed, as Hotch smirked, "Seriously, at least remove some of your clothing." she told him, annoyance filling her voice.

Hotch watched as the woman below him, began to undo his shirt buttons. He pressed kisses along her neck, feeling the cold air hit his back. It sent a shiver down his spine, while Hotch undid his trousers and let them fall to the floor. His hands slid behind her and found the clasp of her bra, and then, awkwardly, his hands began to undo it. "Why do women wear these?" he grumbled, "They're so fiddly."

Sarah smiled at his silent complaint and kissed him, "Maybe 'cause I don't want my cleavage going everywhere." she told him.

"Personally, I wouldn't be complaining." Hotch finally got her bra off and threw it to the floor.

"Shut up." she silenced him with a kiss, as Hotch smirked again. He lowered his head, and then began to press kisses along her exposed body. He was having way too much fun and Sarah couldn't stand it any longer, and her hand moved toward his boxers.

Hotch rid himself of his boxers, and placed the condom over his erect member. He looked down at Sarah, searching her features for any signs of worry or regret, but there were none of the sort, "Are you sure about this?" she whispered.

As soon as she asked the question, a small smile appeared on his face. Hotch reached for her face, and pressed a short but yet, sweet kiss. Then, he nodded, "I'm sure." he murmured against her shoulder, placing a kiss there as well. Hotch's expression softened, at her simple and effective gesture and smiled, she asked if he wanted this... his grip tightening on her hips.

Their eyes were focused on one another, as he rolled them over, hovering above her. With one quick movement, he was within her. His fingers danced up and down her arms, tracing patterns as he looked at her face again, searching for any signs of discomfort, this time. "You alright?" he questioned, his lips grazing against his collar bone.

Sarah pressed kisses against his jaw, "Yeah."

And that's all he needed. He slowly began to move within her, his pace gradually increasing. He was struggling to keep at a steady pace, he'd been waiting for this since he broke it off with her, he'd had to rid his lustful fantasies for both his and Beth's sake, but now... now he didn't have to because the fantasies were his reality. "So beautiful." he whispered, running his hands down her back, a quick shiver following his fingers. He smiled, his teeth teasing the soft skin at her neck, gently nipping and biting.

The thrusts increased along with their pace, the smell of sex laced their sweating skin, shining in the dim light of the bedroom. The faint clap of skin could be heard as the two bodies moved. Her walls tightened around his member while Hotch groaned. They were both escalating to climaxing far too soon.

"Aaron." Sarah moaned, kissing him deeply. At the sound of his name, Hotch gave her what she needed, and she was there. His thrusts became more frantic and his kisses more greedy.

Still suffering from the effects of her first orgasm, Sarah let out another groan of blinding pleasure when Hotch pulled out of her, only to slam straight back into her. Hotch, groaned and let a roar erupt from his chest, as he emptied himself into her, "Sarah." and then he covered her with his body, not long after Hotch felt her burying her head into his neck, breathing in his cologne.

Hotch rolled off of her, once his breathing steadied to a decent pace. Gently he ran his hands through her hair, smiling as she positioned herself on his chest, leaning into his side, getting as close as she could. He smiled, pressing a kiss to her temple and smoothed out her hair. Hotch moved, wrapping an arm around her back, pulling her even closer to his body, wanting her against his bare skin, touching.

"Why didn't you turn me into the cops?" she murmured quietly.

Hotch rested his chin on top of her head, "Because I-" she interrupted him before he could finish his sentence.

"- Beth."

Hotch looked down, all peace escaping from his mind as he closed his eyes and sighed, "Can we just forget about her?" he pressed, "For a second?"

Sarah pulled away, sitting up to look at him, "No, I don't think we can... considering that we've basically just committed adultery." she rushed out, panicking at how stupid she was.

Hotch chuckled, "I'm not married... anymore. And I don't believe you're married either." he explained, pressing a kiss on her shoulder blade. "Beth, doesn't need to know about this."

"I don't know if I can do that." she stated, "I'm not the liar you might be... she deserves to know. We broke this off, and this isn't right."

He rolled his eyes, "Oh, and while we're at it why don't we go tell the team how you murdered six men tonight." Hotch ranted, "That sound good? Because it sounds like fun to me."

Sarah turned and stared at him, "Go on then." she nodded, "Do it."

"What?" Hotch questioned, screwing his face up.

Sarah reached for her cell, "You want to tell the team, let's tell Dave." she searched for his number. "Let's tell Dav- Dave! I've got- " the cell was taken out of her hands quickly.

Hotch ended the call and glared at her. "Are you crazy?!"

"What?" she asked, "Backing out on what you said you'd do? You obviously don't have the balls to do it, so I must be crazy to do it myself. Super crazy!" she reached for the clothes on the floor, and quickly dressed herself. "You can't threaten me, Aaron... I'm a lot harder than you may think I am."

"Where are you going now?" Hotch said, climbing out of his bed to follow her.

"Home or to Police... I haven't decided yet." she admitted, pulling the Harvard shirt on along with the jogging bottoms.

Hotch shook his head, and quickly followed her out of his room and racing toward the front door and bolting it. "No, you are not doing that. No way." he blocked her exit.

"I will climb out of the window- either way, I'm getting out of here." she said, holding his gaze.

Hotch winced, "Stay for the night." he let out, reaching for her hands.

"What?"

"Stay for the night, please." Hotch repeated, "I miss you, so much."

Sarah's jaw tensed, "Let me through, Aaron." she tried to get past him, but he grabbed her shoulders.

"Say it."

Sarah frowned at him, "What?" she stopped feeling really confused. "Say what?"

Hotch smiled, as he reached for her waist, "I know you still love me." Hotch told her, pressing a kiss to her neck.

Sarah's face creased, as she listened to his words, "Oh, now you're dreaming." she pulled away, removing herself from his grasp. "Really dreaming."

"No, I'm not. You willingly slept with me, Sarah. I never forced you... it's just like it used to be." he tried, moving toward her.

She watched as he started toward her. Taking a step back, Sarah quickly grabbed his arms and with all her regaining strength she threw Hotch to the floor, easily demonstrating the training she'd learned years ago.

He quickly hit the ground, and watched as Sarah hauled the door open, "_How it was used to be_, was ruined by you finding Beth, Aaron." she let out, moving out of the door, "We are nothing."


	20. Chapter 20

"Sarah, you're 17 weeks along." Ike Hansen smiled at her.

Sarah slowly looked up, her eyes locked with his. She searched his face, for any signs of the words he'd spoken were a joke. Nothing. She shuddered... he was telling the truth. She was pregnant?

"I'm pregnant? Pregnant?"

Hansen nodded, "You haven't noticed the small formed bump?" he asked, lifting up her shirt to show the now round stomach, which looked extremely prominent... well to Sarah anyway.

"No, I just thought I was getting fat." she suggested, "But then all the tell-tale signs came flooding along... oh my god!" she let out, the news finally getting to her as she stared at her stomach. "You kept it from me!" she accused, quickly looking back up at Ike.

"So, you wouldn't have it aborted, like I knew you would." Hansen rubbed the jell into her stomach, "I can also tell you the gender of the child, if you'd want to know?" he pressed, looking at the monitor.

"Uh..." Sarah nodded, still a little shocked by the unexpected news. "Whatever, I guess."

Hansen carried on, "Everything's fine with the little one, and I'm pleased to tell you it's a boy." he smiled widely at the young woman.

Sarah stared forward, as a frown appeared on her face. "Little murderer in the making." she muttered.

Ike titled his head, "What's wrong?" he pressed, sighing. He knew she'd been funny and go frigid when finding out about this... he knew her. He knew her all too well.

"I can't keep the baby, not when Cullen's the father." she let out, closing her eyes. "... It will just remind of the worst time in my life, and I can't."

"Sarah, a baby is innocent no matter what the parent has done."

* * *

"Do you care to explain was happened the other week?" Nico Vuillermoz, a professional Psychiatrist, looked at Sarah and slowly drew her in and searched her person with his eyes.

_As the song reached her ears, Sarah glanced up and looked to see Garcia and JJ filtering through CD's, "Is that song seriously playing right now?" she questioned, closing her eyes._

_"Yeah!" Garcia called back to her, and continued to look through them._

_"Please turn it off, it's killing me."_

_JJ pulled a face but ignored her, as Garcia handed her more CD's. "Ooh, I like Boyz 2 Men."_

_Dave and Hotch eyed each other, as they watched the woman's jaw tighten as the song carried on. Something was up with their usually calm and collected caramel haired agent._

_"Garcia, please turn that god damn song off!" she blew, letting the whole team know she was not liking the song that was playing on the stereo by knocking a table over._

_The whole room paused and turned to look at her._

_Morgan walked over and took the disc out quickly, putting it back in its case._

Sarah sighed, "I kinda flipped out last week, when one of my friend's played _You got me _by The Roots." she told him.

Nico nodded, "And why was that? Why did you freak out?"

"Because that was the song that was playing when I was raped, and I know now it's a trigger for me which leads me to the feeling and suspicion that I may be Bipolar."

Nico nodded, "So, what time do you start work today then?" he asked, crossing his leg of his other.

"Probably around nine? But then again, if a case comes up, then earlier." she replied, her voice monotone.

Nico frowned, "You don't sound too bothered by it, is something going on at work?" he questioned. Nico had noticed a change in her personality since their meeting three days ago.

"Well, it's awkward considering that I have to work with a guy I'm in love with... and do you want to know the best part?" Nico closed his eyes and nodded. "He's seeing a woman, who to me was watching him which seems kinda weird."

"Sarah, have you ever considered that maybe you need to move on and allow him to live his life with Beth?" Nico pressed, knowing that his suggestions wouldn't, because she was deeply in love with her boss.

Sarah glanced up at Nico, "Are you married? Are you seeing anyone?" she quizzed, tilting her head.

"No, I'm not."

She nodded, "Then, I don't think you have any idea of what I am feeling, right now do you?" she paused, "I'm pregnant with a child that I wish never happened at all but that's not the right thing to think. I got resuscitated five times, died twice, my DNR order was ignored. Everyone on my team is concerned about me, I can't breathe around them, because they're there everywhere I turn."

"Sarah, I need to-"

"I mean, they think I'm gonna do something stupid, but I'm not, they just don't listen."

"Sarah, I really need to-" Nico tried, but Sarah carried on.

"What?" she stopped and looked at the guy. "What is it?"

Nico sighed, as he stared at the confused woman opposite. He didn't want to tell her his feelings and opinions but he had to. "Sarah... I believe that you are Bipolar... I agree that that song is a trigger for you, and that your moods constantly change, I'm going to perscribe you some medication..." he rose to go to a cabinet.

"Are you athourised to give me them from your own cabinet?" she quizzed, tilting her head.

"Yes." he laughed.

She nodded, "Oh alright, but if they make me foggy- I will not be taking them. Will they harm the baby?" she carried on, fiddling with her hands.

Nico sent her a look, "Congratualtions by the way."

* * *

The reflection of the mirror showed a small formed bump.

_How had she missed that? _Sarah's mind slowed into a deep hysteria and confusion. How the hell had this unborn child survived all she had bared during her time with Stuart Cullen. After the rape, there had been much torture, which was near on unbearable.

She was virtually dead when the team had found her.

And now Dwight Hansen had just told her she was pregnant, two months along to be exact.

Pregnant.

It wasn't possible, it couldn't be.

But he'd taken tests, when she was in hospital the previous months. And tests do not lie, especially not blood tests.

Sarah looked up, as she stepped through the glass doors, still thinking deeply.

Pregnant.

Pregnant.

The word covered her brain, as she rubbed her face.

Garcia ran to catch up with Sarah, "Sweet Cheeks, what's wrong? Why'd you need to see Ike?" she pressed, frowning. "Is everything okay? I mean you look okay to me, but I might be completely wron-" she stopped herself, knowing that something was up.

Sarah sighed, opening the glass doors, and setting her things down on a table. "Right, give me your hand." Sarah said, as Garcia willingly handed it to her. "Please don't scream." Sarah said, running her hand along her stomach, letting Garcia feel the slightly formed bump.

Garcia's eyes widened suddenly, "Oh, my god!" Garcia grinned, letting a squeal past her glossy covered lips, completely ignoring what Sarah had just warned her to not do.

"Garcia." Sarah groaned, wishing she hadn't told the woman now. "Please don't scream, squeal or squeak, like you just did."

Derek Morgan and Emily Prentiss had stopped, seeing Penelope shouting madly. They shared a look of confusion and walked over to Sarah and Garcia, catching the end of the conversation, "... I haven't decided yet, but I have a name... already."

"What's goin' ladies?" Morgan frowned, eyeing Garcia especially. "Mamma?" he questioned.

Garcia met his curious eyes, as the excitement surged through her again in the space of five seconds, "Well-"

"- I'm pregnant."

Morgan turned quickly, giving his Sweet Pea a look, "Pre... by Cullen?" he ground out, his eyes landing on the bump growing at her abdominal area. The bump wasn't that big, which suggested that she was at least two months along. Morgan looked up at the woman, frowning at her, before allowing himself another glance at her stomach.

"Apparently, Squirt's the size of a Sweet Potato." Sarah said.

Emily smiled, "Squirt?" she repeated, laughing.

"Yep."

Hotch looked up from his office, seeing Garcia looking extremely excited for a reason he had no idea why. He then saw JJ, Reid and Dave walking over, looking interesting in what was going on.

"Have you thought of a name?" JJ asked, watching as Spencer felt the bump, curiously.

"Well... " she trailed off, "Spencer, he's not a ticking time bomb... he might grow up to be a little mini murderer... but he's not a bomb." she rolled her eyes. "I'm sorry that was awkward."

"I know, but you know he's probably the size of a-"

Morgan sighed, "- A sweet Potato." he finished, "Sweet Pea beat you to it, Pretty Boy." he spoke, still not looking very happy about it.

Dave pulled Sarah away from the group to talk to her privately, he wanted to know it her happy face was a front on her true emotions, "Are you happy about Squirt?" he questioned her quickly.

Sarah looked at him, "At first... I was upset, Ike kept it from me when he took a blood test, which showed that I was pregnant. He knew I would want rid of it as soon as... and well now I'm stuck with Squirt here." she sighed, "But he's a baby, he's not even that yet. A baby is innocent, Dave, he's not like his father, a murderer. I can't hold him to that."

Dave nodded, reaching forward to place a hand on her stomach, "I could've sworn you weren't even round on Monday." Dave chuckled, smiling up at her.

"I didn't even think I was round this morning." Sarah stated, looking confused. "But then came the Nausea, sore breasts, fatigue, cramping, mood swings, all the signs are there... I'm so stupid!"

"He's growing fast."

"Tell me about it." she agreed, "And I think I know his due date considering that the only possible date he could've been conceived for was November tenth and therefore he's gotta be due on August sixth." she explained.

"You've got it all figured out, kid." Dave commented, still smiling. "This little guy is gonna be just fine."

Hotch rose from his chair, walking out of his office, wanting to know what the commotion was about. He spotted the team talking quietly and then his eyes fell on Dave, who was stood talking with Sarah.

"Hey." he greeted the two of them, as he walked over, "What's going on?" he pressed, looking between them. His eyes then fell to her abdominal area, where Dave's hand was still pressed against her stomach. He then noticed the shape, it was unusually round, and then it hit him. "Y- you're pregnant?"

"It would appear so." Sarah replied, as Dave's hand dropped.

Hotch gritted his teeth, "I need to speak with you in my office." he asked, moving away.

Sarah looked at Dave before following Hotch to his office, knowing that the rest of the team were watching.

Hotch held the door open for her, as she stepped past him, going into the office.

He soon followed, closing the doors, and then turned to his office window, seeing the team watching and then closed the blinds. "Pregnant." he spoke, turning to face Sarah.

She nodded, "Yeah." she bit out, not looking at him.

He looked up at her, "Is it mine?" he pressed, remembering the night he made her stay and they slept together.

She shook her head, "No, it's alright you can still play happy families with Beth," Sarah told him, not really thinking about her words or context in which she used them in.

And then Hotch lost it, "What the hell were you thinking?!" he demanded, suddenly. His face had gone red, as anger surged through him. He didn't know what to make about the situation. He was angry, sad, irritated... guilty? Disappointed even?

"What?" she questioned.

"You want to keep his baby? Cullen's child?" he pointed at her stomach, "You want to keep _it_?"

Sarah stared at him, "Whoa, hold up. I never got told I was pregnant when Dwight took those blood tests a couple of months back, he never told me. You want to know why?" she paused, as he nodded. "Because he knew exactly what I'd do if he did- I would have had rid of it as soon as. And right now- right now, I want to sue to him!"

Hotch sighed, "But, he didn't so you're stuck with it?" he glared at the floor.

"It's not an '_it_', Aaron. It's a baby, more so a boy." she corrected quietly.

He stared at her, his eyes glassy as he watched her quietly.

"I didn't ask for this to happen... I didn't want it to happen." she let out quietly, swallowing hard. "I really didn't."

"How far?"

Sarah met his eyes, "Seventeen weeks." she answered.

"Okay." he nodded, "You're going to be replaced with Dave and become my partner while we're in the field, instead of Morgan, so I can keep an eye on you." he explained, seeing her face drop.

"What?" Sarah declared in an outrage. "No. I don't need you babying me."

Hotch sighed, "It's either that or you stay here with Garcia while we're on cases, and personally I know you and I know which one you'd prefer, so do you agree with me?" Hotch asked, staring at her.

"Yes." Sarah nodded, feeling sick.

Hotch noticed this and moved forward, extending his arms toward her, "Sit down on the couch." he led her toward it, and made her sit down, soon taking the seat next to her.

"Who am I kidding?" she let out, "I can't do this."

Hotch reached for her hand, holding it tightly, "Yes, you can... have you even met you?" he asked, seeing her smile just a little. "I mean, you're the strongest person I know."

Sarah scoffed, "That's what everyone says." she murmured, feeling Hotch pull her toward his chest.

"Because it's true." he replied, looking forward, thinking the last time she was in his office. He slid a hand into her hair, as he placed a kiss at her forehead.

_A while ago..._

_Hotch's head rose, as he saw Sarah walk, still in a conversation with Derek Morgan who was sat down in the Bullpen, shouting at her. "Damn, girl!"_

_Sarah turned to Hotch and threw a NFL ball at him, "Hide this, Morgan keeps throwing it at me." she said, before placing files on his desk._

_Hotch smiled at her, "So, we still on for tonight?" he asked, trying to act casual as he asked her while catching the ball._

_She shrugged, "Don't know, you'll have to see if I turn up." she teased, seeing Morgan walking toward the office, she gave him a silent wave and moved to go and get the agent outside._

"Hey, do you wanna know something else as well?"

Hotch hesitated, but nodded in agreement. "Okay?" he spoke, not completely certain if he did want to hear another problem.

"I'm Bipolar."

Hotch stared at her, and frowned. "Bipolar?" he said, tilting his head. "... Is it to do with the song?" he pressed.

"Oh, that's a trigger for me, actually. I mean it all make's sense. I don't sleep a lot, erratic and impulsive behavior, often making poor decisions due to unrealistic ideas about the future. I can appear energetic, excitable, and may be highly productive, as well but that just different levels severity." she paused, "Luckily, according to the doc I've only experienced Manic and Hypomanic episodes."

"How did you get it?" he questioned.

She shrugged, "Apparently it could be either Neurological or Physiological, they have diagnosed it properly yet."

Hotch opened his eyes and sighed lightly, "Everything will be alright..." he trailed off, "Have you got a name for him?"

She nodded and pulled away from his chest, "I was thinking about Luca- it's Italian for Lucas and it means light." she paused, furrowing her eyebrows, "For a middle name, I think... I don't want it to be ironic though, but Jon." she looked up at him.

Hotch nodded, "For it to be even less ironic, you could just nickname him LJ." he suggested, shrugging.

Sarah smiled, "LJ." she agreed, noting his behaviour.

She didn't miss the hope in his eyes when he asked if he was his... no one could. Hotch wanted to be a father again, it was obvious.


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: Sorry... for not updating for a couple of days, I've been quite busy and I've been drafting two new stories... which are nearly ready to be published on here!**

* * *

Hotch was sat doing files, although right now, he was supposed to be on a date with Beth. He looked up hearing a knock on his office door, "Come in."

Morgan walked in, "Hey."

Hotch smiled, "Hey." he repeated the greeting.

"I thought I was the one supposed to be burning the midnight oil." Morgan joked, but soon frowning at all the files sat on Hotch's desk, knowing full well the man wasn't meant to be doing them.

"Well, with Strauss away, the director asked me to do a little extra. I'm actually looking forward to having her back." Hotch said, riffling through files.

Morgan nodded, "Right. It's not the greatest way to spent Valentine's day, now, is it? I forgot, too." Hotch looked at him. Morgan shrugged, "Some of the singles were gonna go find a bar and grab a drink, if you want to come along. I mean, unless there's someplace else you could be." he offered, smiling.

Hotch hesitated, "Uh, I think I'll pass, but thank you." he rose to his feet, gathering his things.

Morgan frowned, watching him. "Uh, what about the paperwork?" he questioned his Boss.

"Well, when Strauss comes back next week, I don't want her to be bored." Hotch replied, making his way to his office door.

"Good night, Hotch." Morgan smiled.

"Good night, Morgan."

He quickly rose to his feet and began rushing around his office, panic and nervousness filling him.

* * *

Hotch rushed to Beth's door, a bouquet of flowers in his hand. He took a deep breath before knocking the door hard. "Hey." The door swung open, as he smiled seeing her.

"Hi." Hotch greeted.

Her eyes fell on the flowers, "Flowers. Wow, thank you." she took them from him. He took in her appearance, seeing that she'd really dressed up. He was dressed smart, as was Beth. Her make-up very prominent though, he noted.

"You're welcome."

Beth reappeared, "It's not even Friday." she said, surprised.

Hotch sighed, "No, I know." he paused. "I just get called away so often, I thought we should grab the opportunity while we had it." he explained the reason why he'd chosen to have their date as soon as possible.

"That was very thoughtful." Beth smiled brightly, "Let me get my stuff." she rushed off again.

Hotch nodded, "Okay." he agreed, glancing around.

When she reappeared, she was full of questions, "So what's our plan?" was her first.

"Well, I suppose I could tell you, but I don't want to spoil the surprise, so you'll just have to trust me." Hotch grinned, flashing tickets quickly, before hiding them again.

Beth smiled. "Oh. My first mistake." Hotch moved to walk down the steps, "Oh."

"Did you forget something?" he questioned, his expression soft but worried, laced with concern.

Beth smiled, "This." she leaned forward, and kissed him. It was soft, sweet, magical. For Beth, it was perfect.

But with Hotch, it was a different story, yeah the kiss was nice and sweet but there were no fireworks. It wasn't like it was with Sarah. Sarah. She made him feel special, different, but with Beth there was nothing. In truth, he was disappointed but something in the back of his mind helped him relax, knowing that Sarah wasn't on a date tonight, actually he wasn't sure what she was even up to.

Beth pulled back, "I thought we ought to get that out of the way. Spare us any awkwardness. You don't have the market cornered on surprises, Aaron." Beth walked by him, taking a hold of his hand.

Hotch laughed, smiling. "You know, it's not often that I'm speechless."

"Really?" Beth asked.

"Yeah." he nodded, "But I am now." They walked down the street, together.

"That's a nice car." Beth pointed out.

"Yeah." he agreed, laughing again.

* * *

Hotch smiled, as he drunk some of his wine.

He listened as Beth chatted about her job and he nodded, interested.

He was brought out of his thoughts when he phone beeped, "I'm sorry Beth, it's probably Dave." he pulled it out, seeing that it was actually from Garcia. He opened it up, as he eyes fell wide on the message; '_SJ's on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, at 11:35, Sir Hotch! It's fun, fun, fun!'_

"Something wrong?" Beth asked, noticing his face, and slowly became worried. She'd never seen him like this before, and she thought it was strange but something in her, made annoyance appear.

"No, Garcia's just text to tell me that Sarah's on Jimmy Fallon tonight." he told her truthfully, smiling at the text. He really wanted to watch, but couldn't, "Just let me text her back quickly." He pulled out his phone again, _Hopefully, I'll get home in time to see it._

"Sarah?" Beth asked, looking both lost and confused. _Who was this Sarah? She must be famous if she's on Jimmy Fallon._

"Uh... Sarah Ward, she works for the Bureau. She's in my team." he smiled at the fact, "She's amazing, and very clever. She's extremely observant and spots most things we miss, she's great." he ranted. "But she's been in the _Jackass_ franchise, _Hairspray_- a lot of musical movies and a band, too."

Beth gripped her hands together under the table, listening to him talk about another woman, especially in that way, too. He obviously liked the woman he was talking about, but Beth knew the name. She was in a band, personally she hated the music, it wasn't her type. She didn't like the films she'd been in either. They were in her opinion, crude. Beth thought it was risky going into a job like the FBI, considering the fact how famous she is.

"Beth?" Hotch frowned, seeing that she was lost in thought. "Beth?"

"Hm-mm?" she questioned, looking up at him.

Hotch's frown disappeared, "Are you ready to order?"

* * *

Hotch pushed his door open, closing it quickly. He soon rushed toward his TV, turning it on, and checked the time.

11:37.

He clicked to the channel he wanted, and ran for a beer, hearing Fallon's voice, "- and tonight, I am glad to announce that for one night only I am going to be joined by the lovely Sarah Ward! All night, can you believe it?!"

Hotch sat back down, and saw Jimmy was now sat behind his desk, "... And I suppose I should welcome on our guest for tonight, and boy she has no idea what's coming her way." he smiled.

Hotch watched as his caramel agent was introduced with the song _The Underdog_ by Spoon, playing in the background. She looked like she usual did; beautiful.

"Hey, you gave me like the best song to come out to." she complained, as Jimmy hugged her to him.

Jimmy smiled at her, "Oh, welcome friend."

* * *

"Welcome back!" Jimmy announced. "I'm with my main gurl, Sarah Ward, and we're going to have a Water War, Ward. Wow, that's a mouthful." Jimmy spoke. "Okay? And this is just like the card game War... but with water."

She nodded, "Okay."

"If you lose, you get splashed in the face. We each have five cups of water, the first one use all of their cups on the other wins. And no funny business." Jimmy joked.

"Says who?"

"The rules." he retorted. "And when one of us wins... they get to water canon the loser." he lifted up a huge water canon as the audience clapped. "You ready for this?" he asked, removing his suit jacket.

Sarah nodded again, "Allons-y!" she took off her jacket too and soon pulled off her glasses. "Just be nice to me, Fallon."

They sat properly, "So, do you wanna start?"

"Well, obviously you've rigged them." she let out, leaning forward.

Jimmy smirked, "Do you wanna switch?" he questioned.

Sarah though about it, and looked at him. "No!" she pointed her finger at him, narrowing her eyes ever so slowly.

The audience laughed again.

"Haha! You sure?" Jimmy asked, grinning.

"No... but I got my eyes on the prize... sprayin' your ass!" she declared. "Right 1... 2... 3... " they both moved three cars and then turned the fourth one over. The fourth both had the seventh of a suit, so it was a draw.

"War!" they both exclaimed, lifting two large jugs of water.

Jimmy then turned the first card over, and he received at look from Sarah, "To hell! I though you never how to play this?!" she exclaimed, moving his card to the end of the table. "You talk out of your ass."

"1... 2... 3... " they turned over the fourth, as Jimmy had a queen and Sarah had a jack.

She cringed, "Oh, this is so not fair." she moaned, laughing. "I've been pied and now watered down! What is this!?" she cried out, as Jimmy burst into laughter.

"Thanks for coming tonight."

She reached for her jug, "Can't we pretend that Jack beats Queen?" she let out, cringing as he moved the jug closer, "Whoa... I like this top?" she tried the excuses quickly.

"Queen beats Jack!" and then he threw the water at her face.

She wiped her face, shaking her head, spitting some water out. "Hey, it's that your Mom?" she frowned, as Jimmy looked around. Sarah quickly grabbed her jug and launched it at him.

Jimmy wiped his face and sent her a look of disbelief.

"Oh, Jimmy you looked so pretty." she messed his hair up, and pressed a kiss to his cheek, "But, c'mon let's do this. I thought you knew how to play this?" she asked him, frowning and shaking her head.

"1, 2, 3!" they turned over the next card and it was the seven of diamonds for Sarah and nine of hearts for Jimmy.

"Oh, my god!" she shouted, annoyed.

"I love you, Sarah." he told her, before chucking the water over her.

She spat some back out, "Obviously not enough."

Jimmy smiled at her, "C'mon."

"1, 2, 3!" they flipped the over again, revealing the four of diamonds and the ten of hearts.

Sarah rolled her eyes, "Seriously! This is rigged." she groaned, seeing the outcome not much different from the first.

He chucked another cup of water against her chest, laughing.

"Someone's getting frisky." she warned, stifling at laugh.

"1, 2, 3." and she lost again.

Another cup of water hit Sarah's face.

"You know what? This is the most fun game I've played in my life!" Jimmy stated, laughing harder.

Sarah sighed, "Let's go, kind sir."

"1, 2, 3!"

This time, Sarah finally won, finally. "Whoop! Whoop!" she picked up two cups of water, "Say hello to ma little friends!" she introduced before throwing one at his face and chest and the other, she tipped down his groin area.

Jimmy suddenly hid his nipples, as Sarah laughed. "Someone get Jimmy here a blow dryer!"

"C'mon let's keep goin'!" Sarah said, watching as Jimmy stuck two cards over his nipples. "Oh, my good god."

"1, 2, 3!" they shouted again, seeing that Sarah had won again.

She reached for another cup, and poured it over his head.

Jimmy smirked, "Right, 1, 2, 3!" and this time Jimmy won. "I love your movies and music!" he shouted, throwing it into her face.

"Right, and again! Sarah said.

"1, 2, 3!" she looked up at him, "No, Ace it high!" she declared as he opened his mouth.

Jimmy nodded, not even bothering to argue even thought she was wrong. "Yeah, you're right." and then he got hit with cold water, "Ooh, that one was cold."

They nodded and smiled at each other, "Whoever wins this is the winner, and I'm pissing my pants if I lose." Sarah told him, winking.

"1... 2... 3... " They flipped the card and Sarah had a Jack whereas Jimmy had the ten of spades.

"No!"

"Oh, yeah." Sarah picked up her last cup and threw it at him, and then she turned and reached for the water canon on the floor. "Thank you for having me, friend!" and then she began firing the water at him, as Jimmy flinched.

She dropped the canon and moved forward to hug him, "Wet buddies, bro!"

Hotch clicked the remote to turn of the television, as he sunk into his chair, sighing. "Why does she do this to me?" he asked himself, pulled of his shirt. "She's just a woman, a woman. There are a lot of women in this world- that is even you live in China where the population of gender is unbalanced- but that doesn't matter. Why is my mind stuck?"

_Why?_


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: Sorry, I've been working on my Thor story and forgot to update! Sorry, it's only 900 odd words!**

**It's gonna be awesome... hopefully!**

**LOKIXOC!**

* * *

"So, dinner tonight?" Hotch asked acknowledging that Sarah was going out, "Who with?" he pressed.

She handed him the files in her hand, "A friend." she answered, absently.

Hotch nodded, feeling something rise in her chest as he went to say something he phone buzzed. He picked it up, seeing that it was Morgan, "How's your sister?" he questioned, putting it to his ear.

"She's awake. She's talking." He spoke, sounding terrible.

"Good." Hotch nodded, "Morgan, take as much personal time as you need." he advised quickly.

"Hotch... I think I might have a case out here."

Hotch's face dropped at the words, confused. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"Look, I need to come clean about something." he paused, taking a deep breath, not knowing what to expect next. "I lied about someone being dead." he finished.

"I'm sorry?"

"Last year..." he sighed, "...that fisherman unsub that was dumping the bodies in the Atlantic, he claimed that my cousin was one of his victims."

"Falsely." Hotch said. "You deduced he'd never met her."

Morgan cleared his throat, "I told my family it was him. Cindi had been missing for 8 years and my aunt needed closure. And even though I kept looking, I lied, Hotch. I lied because I wanted my family to move on. But now there's evidence she's alive...you still there?"

"We're on our way." Hotch said, hanging up.

"Where we off to?" Sarah asked, raising an eyebrow. "Please don't let it be Florida or Miami."

"Chicago."

* * *

"So your cousin fled Chicago 8 years ago because a co-worker was stalking her?" Sarah asked Morgan.

"Yeah," he nodded, "A guy named John Hitchens. Cindi and Yvonne came to me and asked me if they should be worried. Her emails and phone logs showed classic stalker behaviour. Multiple messages every hour." Morgan said.

"Gifts he sent which she later returned. That would enrage a stalker." Reid added, brushing his hair out of his eyes.

"But until they become violent, they're smart enough to skirt the law. Human resources at the investment bank couldn't do anything, and Chicago P.D. couldn't. So Yvonne and I convinced Cindi to move." he paused, "She contacted us from Charleston on her way to Savannah. And then she was gone." Morgan finished.

"And Hitchens blew his brains out two weeks later in Chicago. That was good enough for the local P.D. to conclude that he'd killed her." Sarah sighed, rubbing her temple.

Morgan stopped her short, "Except for one major detail. We never found the body. If his endgame was suicide, he wasn't organized enough to dispose of the body that permanently. That's why I never stopped looking. I just didn't think that she would surface right back here in Chicago." He admitted.

"We need to reopen both cases. Both Cindi's disappearance and Hitchens' suicide." Hotch informed them all. "The discrepancies in each would explain her current behaviour. Morgan, I need to talk to you when we land." Hotch warned the man.

"I can't wait." And then he was gone.

* * *

"Detective Palmer, what do you have?" Dave asked.

The detective shrugged, "I wish we had more to give you. You know how missing persons cases are." He sighed in defeat.

"Actually, there's quite a bit here. These were found in Hitchens' apartment after the suicide. Some were blown up from the original film stock." Spence spoke, blu-tacking them to the board.

"So if Hitchens took them, he didn't zoom in on Photoshop. He's an old-school shutterbug." Emily said, looking around at the group.

Hotch folded his arms over his chest before speaking, "Reid and Prentiss, check Hitchens' photographic background. Even 8 years ago, most people had gone digital." He ordered them.

"The gun Hitchens used to kill himself was traced to this dealer." Dave said, looking at a sheet of paper.

"Local guy. Completely by the book. No record." The Detective replied.

"The 44 was the only gun in Hitchens' possession. That's a big gun to kill yourself with." JJ said.

"We should talk to the dealer, find out what his mindset was when he bought it." Hotch suggested, looking at Dave and Sarah, wanting them to go and see.

* * *

"The gun was bought eight years ago?" The guy behind the counter asked.

Dave lent against the counter, frowning. "At least, if not longer." Dave told him.

"Here we go." He grabbed a file and flicked through the pages. "Oh, yeah. There he is." He nodded, turning it so they could both see.

"John Hitchens?"

Sarah and Dave exchanged confused looks with each other, seeing that it wasn't him.

"Hitchens?" he shook his head. "No, ma'am. The fellow who bought this piece was Malcolm Ford." He corrected her, passing her the photo in his hand. "Hm-mm." He then excused himself.

"Well, maybe the gun traded hands." Sarah looked at Dave again, "Malcolm Ford sold it to Hitchens, and Hitchens shot himself?" she suggested.

"Or he never sold it to Hitchens at all. He used it on him." Dave concluded, tilting his head.

"So I guess the real question here is, who's Malcolm Ford?"


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: Sorry, I havem't updated in like FOREVER! As you might have notcieed I've published a Loki story which is kinda new for me... so hopefully it will get a decent amount of love.**

**Thanks for being patient and I apologize for this being short but it takes place after "The Company."**

* * *

Morgan sighed as he walked into the bullpen, from having two weeks of to spend with his family in Chicago. His eyes soon found his team, who were sat in the conference room, chatting.

Cindi was fine... and there was no Malcolm Ford lying behind any corner.

His family was safe... everyone was safe.

He'd saved his family and everyone was safe.

Safe.

It was his new favourite word, because it made him feel safe inside.

He set his go bag down by his desk, and went to the break area and got himself a well deserved cup of coffee. "Hey, sugar." he turned and saw Garcia.

"Hey, princess." he greeted, tiredly.

Garcia moved forward and place a comforting hand on his shoulder, "Are you okay?" she tilted her head, blinking at him.

Morgan nodded, "Yeah. My cousin's safe and so Anthony." he smiled, taking a deep breath.

"Good, come join us!" she grabbed his hand, and began pulling him toward the Conference room.

The group was sat around the table, chatting and smiling as they all turned and saw Morgan and Garcia walking into the room. They all sent him small smiles, as he took the spare seat next to Sarah.

"We did you good guys." Dave announced, raising his mug. "Cheers."

The team all followed suit and also riased their glasses and clinked them against one anothers. "Cheers." they all let out together.

Hotch looked at Sarah and narrowed his eyes before mouthing, _are you okay? LJ okay? _

Sarah nodded, not noticing her hand rubbing her stomach.

Morgan sighed and sat back in his chair, smiling widely. He looked down as he saw a hand take his. It was Sarah. She pulled his hand and pressed it against her stomach. He frowned, and then his smile reappeared as he felt the baby inside her stomach kick. "It looks like Squirt wants to celebrate as well." he whispered in her ear.

"Care to share?" Dave's voice reached them, as they looked over at him.

Sarah smiled, "Derek said that Squirt wants to celebrate as well, because it feels like my stomach in about to cave in from all his kicking."

Garcia laughed happily, "Two more months and he'll be here!" she chimed in excitement.

"Let's just hope I don't kill over from all the kicking." she said, as Anderson rushed into the room.

Grant looked around and his eyes landed on Sarah, "Sarah, Sebastian's at the reception." he informed her as she stood up.

"Why? It's one thirty, he's meant to be at school." she and Anderson walked out of the Conference room, "Grant, could you go get him for me?"

Anderson nodded and quickly rushed off.

Around ten minutes later, Anderson stepped out of the lift with Sebastian following behind him, carrying a bag of frozen peas against one side of his face. "Agent Ward!" Anderson shouted, as she looked around and her face dropped.

"What the happened to your face?!" she exclaimed in panic, seeing a large red mark and a big cut. "Did you get into a fight?" she walked over to him, crouching down to his height.

"Yeah." Sebastian nodded, as she lifted him up onto the table in the break area. "Jesus, how hard he'd hit you?"

Sebastian shrugged, "I don't know, I think I hit him pretty hard because he started crying." he explained, as she pulled some ice out of the refrigerator.

"I hope he cried all the way home to his mom." she pressed it against his cheek. "But why did you get into a fight in the first place?"

Sebastian shrugged, "He called me an..." he trailed off at the end so Sarah couldn't here him.

"What?"

Sebastian refused to meet her eye as she asked him, and he looked down.

"Seb," Sarah began, "What did he call you?" she persisted, frowning.

He looked up back up at her, "He called me an Orphan." he stated, as her face hit the ground in shock. "Saz?"

She stepped back and reached into her pocket, pulling out her cell to call the school but he took it out of her hands before she could dial the number. "Sebastian!" she shouted.

"No, I don't need you to fight my battles for me, I can do it on my own!" he argued, hiding her cell from him.

Sarah sighed, "Sebastian, I've gotta look out for you and if I can't stop you from fighting then I can talk to the school about it." she told him.

Sebastian smirked, "Trust me Saz, he won't mess with me no more- not now that he knows I throw a mean punch and that my aunt works for the FBI." he joked, getting a smile out of her.

"Hey Seb, my man!" Morgan called, walking over to them. "I hope you kicked the punk's ass."

Sebastian laughed and nodded, "He cried." he told Morgan.

"Wha?" Morgan questioned, "He cried? Wow, he won't mess with you anymore, buddy... high five!" Morgan raised his hand and Sebastian hit his hand hard. "All right soldier!"

Sarah sighed, "What am I gonna do with you? Huh?" she asked Sebastian, as he smiled at her.


	24. Chapter 24

The team stood, cheering and waiting, as Hotch competed in his triathlon. "Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!" Morgan and Reid along with Dave and Jack were cheering as loud as they could, while the three women of the BAU were groaning in pain. Morgan chuckled and turned to Garcia, JJ and Emily who were stood with sunglasses covering their eyes.

"A couple hours. A couple hours." Reid shouted, grinning. "You guys didn't come home 'til sunrise."

JJ sighed, "Why are you yelling?" she muttered, still suffering from a terrible headache.

"Make him stop." Emily asked, her voice sounding dark and shaky.

"Okay, hey, Jack, Jack." Morgan caught Jack's attention quickly. "Earmuffs for a minute. Earmuffs." he asked, as he hands went over his head. "What did you guys drink last night?" he pressed, amused by the whole situation.

Garcia looked up at Morgan, "The green fairy." The others answered with a groan. "You're in the FBI; can't you get the crowd to stop?" she questioned, keeping her hands against her head.

"By my estimates..." Reid glanced down at his watch and announced, "Hotch should be finishing any minute."

Jack's face lit up at his words, "Can you see him uncle Dave?" he pressed, excited.

Dave nodded, "I think I do Kiddo, right over there!" Dave shouted, as the girls rolled their eyes and carried on groaning in pain.

Hotch suddenly ran past, a big and growing grin on his face as he caught sight of his team cheering him along. He ran by and quickly grabbed a bottle of water as a medal was handed to him by someone. His attention shifted when he heard his son's shouts. "You did! You did it dad!"

Hotch turned and nodded, "I did buddy, I sure did." he moved and placed the medal over his neck. "Can you believe it?"

Jack smiled, "Did you see my sign?" he pressed, holding it up.

"That's for you." Hotch said referring to the medal first, and then he smiled even more. "Yours sign's fantastic."

Dave strolled over, smirking. "Look at you. How'd you feel?" he called over to Hotch as he stopped near the father and son, the rest of the team following.

"I think I'm gonna live," he let out, taking another sip of water.

"That's pretty impressive," Emily sung as they all looked at her, "I had money on the swim killing you," Emily smirked jokingly.

Hotch nodded, returning the smirk. "I practiced," Hotch spoke, feeling proud but tired.

"And it paid off, good job," Morgan congratulated, grinning at his boss. He also thought the swim would have finished him off, but he couldn't hide that he was very impressed.

"Thank you."

"Hey, should we get something to eat?" Reid suggested, knowing they were probably all starving from waiting for Hotch to finish.

Jj then piped up in agreement, "Yeah, something greasy," JJ nodded, feeling hungry.

"Oh yeah," Emily exclaimed, smiling.

Hotch turned and saw someone. "Beth!" he grinned, turning to Jack. "Jack, there's someone I want you to meet. Come here." he took his son's hand rushing toward Beth.

Beth smiled, as she hugged him, "You were amazing! Congratulations!"

"Thanks." Hotch nodded, pulling away quickly. "Beth, I'd like you to meet my son Jack."

"Hi." Jack smiled, shaking her hand.

Hotch smiled, as he looked at Jack, "Jack, this is my friend Beth." he introduced them.

"Hey there, Jack. It's nice to meet you." Beth smiled, crouching to his height.

Jack grinned, "Do you work with my dad, too?" he asked, tilting his head.

"No." Beth shook her head, "We're just friends." she then noticed his poster, "Hey, don't tell me you made that."

Jack nodded, eagerly, "Yep. I coloured it myself and put the sparkles on, too." Jack showed it to her, grinning.

"You know what? I look at art all day long, and that, my friend, is pretty good." Beth said, making an effort to befriend Jack.

"Thank you."

Beth nodded, standing up again, "Well, you're welcome." she told Jack.

Hotch breathed out, still panting, "We were gonna go get something to eat. You want to come?" he questioned.

"Sure." she agreed.

"Okay." The three of them walked toward the rest of the team. "Great. Come on, buddy."

But Jack had stopped, "Saz!" he exclaimed. "Hey, Seb!"

Hotch turned, following his son as he saw Saz walking over with Sebastian, smiling. "Jelly!" she said, as he ran over to them both. He watched as his son proceeded to do a secret hand-shake with Sarah, who met him in unison. "You're getting good at it, you've been practicing, been doin' the same with soccer?"

"Yeah! I'm getting better everyday." Jack replied, grinning. "Hi Seb."

"Hi, Jack." Sebastian greeted, "Can I go feed the ducks? What about to pigeons?" he pressed to Sarah, who looked at him.

"You should join the soccer team in your year." Jack suggested, drawing Sebastian's attention quickly.

Sarah smiled at his suggestion, "That sounds like a good idea, little guy."

"Did you see Dad?!" Jack exclaimed, as they walked over.

Sarah nodded, "You bet I did. Personally, I thought the swim would finish him off." she joked, allowing Hotch a small smile.

"Thanks." he nodded. "It seems you and Emily think a like."

"A woman's intuition." Emily stated, raising her hands in defense.

"You must be Beth." Sarah caught on, spotting the brunette standing beside Hotch, with light eyes. "I'm Sarah." she moved forward to shake her hand.

"Oh, I've heard about you." Beth said, smiling awkwardly.

Sarah nodded, her eyes trailing to Hotch, "All good I hope." she said, not really wanting know what she'd been told. "This is Sebastian." Sarah turned as the little boy waved at Beth.

"Your son?"

Sarah stared at her, "No." she looked to Hotch and then back to Beth, "He's my brother's son."

"Hey." Morgan interrupted their conversation, "Sweetness we're gonna go for something to eat, you joinin'?" he asked, hugging her tightly.

Sarah looked at them all. "Uh, Seb?" he turned to the little boy beside her, "You wanna?"

"I guess, it'd be cool." he agreed, shrugging.

Dave chuckled, "It's sorted then!" he announced, marching forward with both Jack and Sebastian by his side.

Morgan stayed at Sarah's side, noting how tired she looked, "You alright?" he quizzed, frowning at her.

She nodded, as he linking his arm with hers, "I'm all good, Derek." she promised, "Mission POD is a go no to launch, no need to panic." she joked, hearing him chuckle at her antics.

"That's good, he's not ready yet." he noted, tilting his head.

"He's seven months, I should hope not."

Morgan agreed, nodding as they followed Dave and the two boys.

Dave turned, "Jayje, are Will and Henry meeting us there?!" he shouted, knowing that the three women at the back were struggling as it was- especially with their killer hangovers.

JJ grimaced, she glanced around the area, seeing lots of children so she decided against what she was going to say and settled for something else. "Yes, Dave. They're on their way." she replied, kindly.

The others knew if anyone else was to shout, that one of the three of them would flip.

"Dave, that's secretly means shut your pie hole." Sarah informed him, as he laughed even more.

"I'm gonna annoy them for the rest of the day," Dave declared, as they all approached the diner he was taking them all to.

* * *

Will and Henry quickly rushed into the Diner, seeing the team already sat around a large table. "Hey!" Will greeted, waving to them all.

Henry ran past, grinning. "Saz!" he exclaimed, flinging himself into Sarah's arms. "Missed you!" he let out, hugging her tightly.

JJ's face fell, "Oh, okay?" she questioned, looking really confused.

Sarah set Henry down, as he ran over to Jack and Sebastian, "Hey guys." he greeted, seeing them colouring quietly.

"War." JJ told her friend.

"A declaration of war?" Sarah repeated, tilting her head, "Sounds fun, why not?" she agreed, putting up her fists.

Beth smiled, "So, how far along are you?" she questioned Sarah, as every member of the team tensed.

"Seven Months," she told the brunette.

Beth nodded, "And what's the father like?" Beth carried on, not seeing the looks she was getting from everyone else. "Is he already smitten?"

Garcia quickly rose to her feet and turned to the three boys, "Right, my little soldiers, how about some Ice Cream for your mighty tums?" she suggested, as they all followed her.

Sarah swallowed, watching them go. "Let's see shall we... " she paused, "The father of this unborn child was a murderer, whom I killed because he murdered my brother which when you think about it also makes me a murderer." she sighed, "It's quite surprising that you haven't seen the new coverage on it, which lasted for at least a month?" she stood quickly, "You'll have to excuse me."

They all watched her walk out of the entrance to the diner, and stand outside.

Hotch walked outside, seeing Sarah walking up at the street. "Sarah!" he called, trying to bring her over to him.

She turned and rolled her eyes, "What?" she replied, not really wanting to see him.

"Come back inside."

Sarah sighed, "Just let me stay outside for a little bit." she said, as Hotch drew nearer to her. "You didn't tell her?"

Hotch shook his head quickly, "Who'd you take me for, of course I didn't." he stated, "That's not fair on you."

"I wouldn't have mind." she admitted, "It would have been less awkward, if you did."

"She didn't mean anything, it was harmless.

Sarah strained a smile, "I know." _That doesn't mean it didn't hurt me._


End file.
